Chapter Text
So it all started with Ginny. Or perhaps not.
Rather, we did this trick together. We’re a team, after all.
She’s tiny and funny, my Ginger. Blushing, lips pout, she came to me looking all pretty and all, made sure Ron wouldn’t hear us - she’s still shy, my Ginger - and started whispering into my ear, her murmur sending shivers down my spine. Let’s go tomorrow, she said, and look into the Mirror.
I didn’t even get it at first, so she looked at me as if I was an idiot, like, come on, it’s St. Valentine’s tomorrow, all couples should go to the Erised to “Prove their Feelings”…
Sure as Trelawney’s shit, this was the girls’ invention to hang around the Mirror of Erised with their boyfriends. That is, to peek into the deepest desires of each other’s hearts. To detect if they’re a good match, you see. But I think it’s more of the matter of trust. I mean, girls just love to test things. As in, if a boy’s into them for real or just messing with them. And if a boy agrees, it means he’s for real.
So what, if it suddenly turns out that a poor lad has the wrong desires? A fixer-upper, as Uncle Sirius likes to say. Just think about it, they even figured out how to hack the magic mirror. Would you have figured it out? Right, me neither. But the girls did… I mean it, if a woman really wants something, magic is powerless.
Why on earth it’s a must to come to the mirror at night, I’ll never know. To maximise the romance, I guess.
So I told her like, come on, Gin, use your head! It’s Valentine’s tomorrow. In honour of the holiday Filch and Norris are gonna be up all night. And we are like marching to the mirror. There’s sure to be a queue as long as Basilisk Tail. Just Imagine, when this merry crowd gets busted by our cat lover, our only deepest heart desire will be to get away with merciful detention. I say, to the hell with such romance. Let’s go any other day.
So Ginger got wild of course. Why, she had such a wonderful idea to look together into the Erised on the St.Valentine’s day! And I was such a fun sponge and a massive twat. That’s the worst word she uses, thinks it’s the most obscene. All in all, she said, she’d rather not go at all, if I didn’t want to.
So I said, hey, what makes you think I don’t want it, I do. Let’s go. If only not on the 14th, but rather say… on the 28th of February, all right?
And she’s like, why so long to wait? Damned if I know. I just blurted the number out. You know what, I said, relax or it will be the 29th. This only made her huff and snarl at me, so I said, easy Gin, or you’ll nag me into doing it on the 13th.
And she grabbed Hermione’s numerology textbook and whacked me on my head with that brick.
Which meant it was fine, and she agreed.
Gin is great. I mean, really, she’s the best. I’ve been out with other girls, so I can tell. Well, “go out” is a strong way to put it. I tried to make out with that prom queen in fourth year. That is with Cho, the oriental princess. But to no effect. We had had two and a half dates and all I got was a massive brain suck. It felt as if we’d been married for twenty years already. Nah, no good looks worth that, thank you very much.
But Ginny is easy-going. She can’t be mad for too long, and if something’s wrong, she’d rather kick my arse than badger me with hints like Hermione does with Ron. Oh, these two are something! I can’t even. Hermione can make the most impenetrable things penetrate even Ron’s thick skull. Like order of evaluation in numerology or chemical reactions in advanced potions. Anything, except for one thing - why she got mad at him.
And then Ron turns to me for clues, of course. And she comes to me to cry the blues. Fucking hell.
Anyway, I think you already got it. I am very lucky with my girlfriend, and my friends are nutcases.
Alright, where were we?
So, we’ve made it to the 28th. After curfew, I was waiting for Ginny at the girls’ dorm, wrapped in the cloak, naturally. There’s enough space for two of us, I’m no big guy, and Ginny, Ginny’s a little darling.
The greatest perk of it is that under the cloak she doesn’t dare to squeak, so I’m free to squeeze her with all my might. Well, how can I not, when she’s right there beside me, so warm, and soft, and sweet!
Absolutely irresistible.
So, there we were, sneaking to the room, and then it hit me that I had forgotten to take a pocket mirror. Damn, will have to transfigure it somehow. But Ginny only giggled at this. It’s all covered, she said, so relax, you, transfiguration maniac. There’s a spare mirror in a closet for such purpose.
Even a few mirrors. Just in case, as a reserve.
Oh, those girls! Can you believe it?
With the Erised it works like a charm. One’s got to look into it and see their dream. And the other one is to turn their back at it and peek into the pocket mirror to reflect the Erised. Sort of periscope. Turns out, there’s no problem to see someone else’s deepest heart desire, easy peasy.
Ginny was the first to show me hers, I didn’t mind.
In the periscope, all I could see was a white dress. Or rather, a Big White Dress. Inside the Dress, there was Gin, with a hairdo and a bridal veil on the top of it. My own mug was hardly seen amidst all this magnificence, but it’s all right.
I didn’t even goof on her. Low blow, to laugh at a heart’s desire, right? After all, she’s just a girl, albeit an amazing one. You know what all the girls want. To get married and have their big day and look like some grand royal cupcake for everyone to marvel at and die of envy. Veil wearing, rings exchanging, bouquet throwing… They’re brought up to believe these are the most important things in life.
Saturated with it, Gin turned to me, eyes glowing and cheeks blushing - did you see it? So I said, I did, but couldn’t see if we snogged or not. She took the hint of where this was going and got confused. Of course, she did, her mother is strict with her when it comes to such things… but then suddenly she clung to me, saying, fine, kiss away.
So I did. Who am I to say no to this, right? Now you can imagine I wasn’t exactly happy with the sort of heart desires the Erised kindly displayed for me after that. I mean, ahem, happy I was to see what it offered, but it came together with a bad feeling that my arse was going to be kicked again.
Well, sure, the next thing I saw was my Ginger, losing it completely, red with rage, coming right at me. So that’s what you are, she said, just like any other boy!
I’m telling you, the most important rule with women is to say you’re sorry before it’s too late. So I said, right, that’s what I am, sorry. And also that I didn’t want it with just anybody, only with her.
See, I’m no fool, I know what to say.
So I go on, like, Gin, you want us married, right? And that’s the least of what married people do.
My Ginger got all confused again and said, Harry, marriage is still a long way off. And I’m still young. What if you wouldn’t want to wait for me to be ready for so long?
And as she was saying it, I saw her getting more and more miserable. So that’s what it was. My poor silly Ginger was worried I’d bail on her for some easy girl.
So I said, Gin, what are you talking about! I’m still young too. We’ll wait for it together. It’s not even too long to wait, just two years and a half.
This simple arithmetic cheered her up, and we decided to take off. I walked her to her dorm, and… suddenly it felt as if there was rocket fuel in my veins. I knew it was no good to look into the Erised too often, but it made me so damn curious. Was it Ginny’s presence and our kissing that affected me, or was I indeed just like any other boy and sex was the only thing on my mind?
Long story short, I creeped back in, the goddamn naturalist. And all but ran into the greasy Hogwarts star, that showed up out of blue right beside me. That’s right, there he was, our unappreciated potions genius, prowling down the corridor.
Phew…
At first, I froze in fear, but then thoughts began thoughting. I mean, everyone knew our Snapie loved the night watch. Maybe it’s because he’d lost his sleep to extra spite, or maybe it was his guilty pleasure to suck the fun out of everything, including couples’ fun activities. But not that day, I’d heard with my own ears it wasn’t his shift. What was more, we was definitely heading to the mirror of Erised.
Now, what was it, did he have a date and a “feelings check” scheduled too? With Trelawney, for instance. Or old Pincey, maybe, why not. I nearly cracked up picturing this, but cracking out loud wasn’t the best idea, as I was right on his heels, of course.
Meanwhile, we got to the place, and I seeped carefully in. Snapie was too busy to notice anything, he already was all over the mirror. I mean it figuratively of course, not that he’d literally pull Alice and go through it. But with this creep you can never know.
No, his hook-nosed organism remained here. Knelt on his boney knees in front of the mirror, his spidery fingers running along the surface, as if in a trance. But his bastardish soul was totally out there, consumed with it…
The peeking mirror was left on the table, Ginny was too steamed up to remember to put it back, so it was right there within my reach, like an invitation. And who wouldn’t want to know what their worst enemy desired so much he all but whimpered? What if he dreamed of poisoning me or something?
The way I had to mess around with cloak and mirror to bend it right, was enough to make a horse laugh. I all but tied myself in a knot to see…
When I saw it, I wished he’d actually wanted to poison me, really. I didn’t even recognise myself at first. Like, unconsciously I refused to see. I mean it. Aren’t there lots of guys this old prick wanted to bang? Aren’t there lots of brunettes out there? Young and short ones. With green eyes. And a face just like mine…
I think I’d have killed him on the spot, if I could. I nearly burst into small pieces with anger. How dare he! I even came up with a plan. Turn him over to the Headmaster. Show Dumbledore the true face of his favourite pet. Then call for my parents. And Uncle Sirius. Sirius would surely chew him up and spit out. And then bring him to justice. He belonged to Azkaban, away from decent society.
I freaked out like this for a while, but quickly came to my senses. What evidence can I present aside from the Erised reflections? After all, heart’s desires are everybody’s own business, and thoughts can’t be penalised.
Meanwhile, Snapie started to make the sounds that made my skin crawl. What was he, jerking off there or something? No, please, not this, my fragile teen psyche won’t bear it.
And then suddenly I heard - Harry. I nearly had a heart attack. Thought he noticed me. As he’d never ever called me by my first name. Always been above that, right?
Anyway, the freak wasn’t looking at me, I was still invisible, and he still had better sights to look at. In there, he had his Harry. His loved one.
This “loved one” was still echoing in my ears when I got back to my dorm. I winced each time I remembered it. And then I just powered off. What to do about Snape and how to get back at him, I haven’t decided yet.