Chapter Text
—Darry Curtis—
Nineteen year old Darry Shayne Curtis Jr. had it all figured out. He had graduated high school at almost the top of his class, a superstar football player, and had a half scholarship to Texas State University waiting for him when he came up with money for the other half.
He had to admit, it wasn’t what he was hoping for. When the letter came in the mail, as glad as he was for what he got, he knew it wasn’t enough. The only thing worse was the look on his parents’ faces when he told them. Darrel and Maggie Curtis did everything they could to provide for their three sons, so every dime was put toward keeping enough food on the table. There was no college savings. It wasn’t their fault, but the look of shame was identical on both of their faces.
“It’s okay.” Darry lied. “I don’t mind waiting a year. I’ll work full time, and by next August, I’ll have enough.”
His father mustered a tight-lipped smile on his lips, still sad, but at least now he could see a glimmer of pride in his eyes. He walked up, and silently put an arm around his shoulder.
“We’re so proud of you, honey.” His mother smiled up at him gently.
Maggie Curtis was a beautiful woman. Dark golden hair and shining hazel eyes. She spoke with a soft and firm voice that would make any hood stop and obey her every word. Even the notorious delinquent Dallas Winston adored Maggie Curtis. She was smart, but hardly ever lost her temper. She was the perfect mother.
Darry and his father looked so similar that people would think they were brothers rather than father and son. The same short brown hair, tall, muscular build. Tan from working outside, more his father, since Darry had only worked part-time. He was a passionate, driven man who loved his family more than anything. He was famous for his humor, and ability to lighten any situation.
Darry hated to see them feel guilty about not being able to pay for college. They both did the best they could; it wasn’t their fault. Of course, that didn’t stop Darry from being jealous of the kids at school who worked half as hard but got everything he wanted. He tried not to linger on it for too long; he knew the score. Besides, it was only a year. What difference would it make if he started at nineteen versus twenty? One year ain’t nothin.
“Hey, Junior, I can tell you been workin’ hard lately. Good job, bud.” Darry’s father bumped his shoulder. They were driving home after a particularly hot day of work. June in Tulsa was hell. Darry hated the feeling of sitting in his own sweat. He couldn’t wait to go home and take a shower.
“‘Course.” Darry shrugged. What else could he do? Darry just was a hard worker. He always worked hard at everything, whether he liked it or not. He didn’t know any other way, to be honest. That was how he earned all of his achievements, even if they didn’t amount to much.
“I’m just sayin’, you’re doin’ better than summa the guys that’ve been doin’ this shit for 40 years. That’s impressive.” He smirked at the road in front of them.
“Yeah, it ain’t college or nothin’. But hey; I’m sure glad I can haul wood up a ladder.” Darry rolled his eyes.
“Patience, Junior. You’ll get there soon. I’ll bet it’ll feel ten times better when you worked hard for it, too.”
“Yeah, maybe.” Darry’s gaze drifted out the window.
His mom had cooked grilled chicken for dinner. His favorite. To be fair, everything his mother cooked was his favorite.
The table conversation wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. Sodapop chatted everyone's ears off, Ponyboy struggled to get a word in edgewise. Their mother just listened contently, and their father would make a joke every once in a while. Everything was exactly the way it was supposed to be.
After a few minutes of this, Darry’s mind began to drift. Would he miss this when he went off to college? He was really close to his father, and enjoyed spending time with him every day. He loved his mother very much as well. He even considered missing his annoying little brothers. Go figure.
He was sharply brought back to earth by the sound of the door slamming open.
“Howdy, Curtis’s!” Two-Bit hollered from the kitchen. “Do I smell chicken?”
“Come make yourself a plate, honey.” Maggie Curtis stood up, grabbing clean dishes from the cupboard.
Two-Bit waltzed into the kitchen, the same lazy smirk on his face that he always wore. “You made me my favorite. How very thoughtful.”
“Yes, yes, take my seat at the table Keith- please pour that milk in a glass.” She sighed at the sight of him swigging straight from the carton.
“Glory, Two-Bit, didn’t your mama teach you any manners?” Sodapop laughed, eyes sparkling.
“Boy, do you know it!” He clambered his way over to the table, wiping the milk off his face.
“Why don’t you ever eat supper with your own family, Two-Bit?” Ponyboy rolled his eyes, and Two smacked him upside the head.
“If you must know, Mr. Nosy, I already did. I’m still hungry.” He said, scooping himself an absurd amount of mashed potatoes.
Darry had to stifle a laugh at their antics. Keith Mathews had been his best friend as long as he could remember; their mothers had been best friends since before he was born. They were family.
“So Dar, how’s the life of a working man?” Two-Bit inquired with an eyebrow raised.
“Figures you don’t know.” Darry teased. Keith was seventeen, but they all joked that he’d never get a job. Darry knew ten year olds with more responsibility.
Two-Bit stood up abruptly, low and ready to pounce. “Woah, take it easy, you break something you’re payin’.” Mr. Curtis interrupted.
“With what money?” Darry muttered under his breath. He figured Two heard him, because the two of them soon went flying to the floor.
“Oh, you think you can take me now, tough guy?” Darry strained, rolling over and pinning him to the floor.
“I gotta secret weapon, muscles…” He paused dramatically, then swiftly kicked him in the groin and jumped on top of him during his surprise.
“Eat shit, asshole.” Darry recovered, grabbing him in a chokehold.
“UNCLE!!” He hollered dramatically. “You’re a real jerk, Darrel.” He got on his feet, promptly flipping him off as he walked back to the table. Nobody was even paying attention to them anymore. Mr. Curtis was walking his dishes to the sink and whispering something to his wife. Soda and Pony were laughing about something, next to Two-Bit who was stuffing his face.
School would be starting back up in the fall, and Darry had a feeling he wouldn’t be used to the idea of not going to school every day. It would be weird, watching his kid brothers walk out the door every morning with their bags and books, and to not be right behind them. He hadn’t loved school, despite excelling in all subjects, but working full time made school look like a vacation. Darry hadn't minded his job when it was only part-time. Just some mindless labor. Roofing houses was hard work, but that’s why he did it. Darry was a hard worker, like his father.
He worked from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. during the week, and 7 a.m. to noon on Saturdays. It was feeling more and more like he had no time for himself.
Keep going, Darry. It’ll all be worth it. Just keep going.
After supper, Darry sat with Two-Bit and both of his parents in the family room. Mr. Curtis sat in the recliner, flipping through channels. Pony and Soda were supposedly doing the dishes, but judging by the giggling and occasional bang of something falling, they were doing anything but.
“You plannin’ on stayin’ the night, Keith?” Darry questioned. Darry and his parents were the only ones who even still called Keith by his real name sometimes. He hadn’t acquired his nickname until school, and nobody else really knew him before that.
“Naw, I’ll head home soon. Somebody outta make sure Lila makes it to school in the mornin.” Lila was Two-Bit’s little sister; one of the ten year olds with more responsibility than her seventeen year old brother. She came to Curtis's sometimes, and had an incredibly huge crush on Ponyboy. Said crush was completely obvious to everyone except Pony, but the youngest Curtis never did notice much going on in the real world. He always had his head crammed into a book or something, never paying attention. It annoyed Darry, like a lot of other things his brother did. Not that it mattered. Darry and Ponyboy had a very simple relationship; Darry looked out for him, and Pony looked up to him. There wasn’t ever very much more due to the seven year age gap. They got along for the most part, and that was enough for both of them. Darry had his closeness with his father, and Ponyboy had Sodapop.
Pony and Soda always had a special relationship, and anyone could see it. Another level of understanding, maybe. Pony looked at Soda with stars in his eyes, and Sodapop adored it. They did almost everything together; at least unless Soda’s best friend Steve had a say. Ponyboy and Steve didn’t get along so well. Steve didn’t like Pony tagging along with them, so he didn’t sometimes.
Darry wasn’t jealous of, well, whatever they had. He couldn’t care less, to be honest. They were much younger than him, and if Darry spent enough time with them he’d about knock their heads together.
Darry’s attention was only ripped back to reality at the sound of his mother’s horrified gasp. “Glory…” His father muttered.
He looked up at the television, and his heart dropped. Front and center were the big white words: 1971 Draft Lottery Confirmed for August 1st.
And the little caption: Young men born in the year 1952 are to be drafted for the US conflict within Vietnam.
Darry’s birthday was January 5th, 1952. He had barely turned nineteen.
His breath was caught in his throat, and it took him a minute to collect himself. He looked over at his mother, whose face was white and still. He gently took her hand, and she leaned into him. “It’ll be okay, ma.” He whispered, to no reply.
“Jesus…” Two-Bit stood up, and shook his head. “Don’t you even worry Dar. There’s so many guys, I doubt you’ll even get picked anyway. Ain’t nothin’ to worry about.”
“Worry about what?” Sodapop wondered aloud as he strode into the room, Ponyboy in tow. “What the… Darry?” Darry’s heart dropped when he heard Soda’s voice wobble. Darry was never good with emotions, which is why it was very inconvenient to have a kid brother like Sodapop. He was all emotions, never bothering to hide them.
“There ain’t nothin’ to worry about, right? Darry’s goin’ to school. They don’t ship out the boys goin’ to school.” Ponyboy blinked.
Silence. The most deafening silence any of them had ever heard before.
“Pony, I ain’t goin’ to school ‘till next year, remember? I’m takin’ a break year.” Darry had never felt more numb in his life. He felt like he was outside of his body, watching the scene unfold from somewhere else.
“No…” Ponyboy whispered. “No, they can’t do that. You’re only taking off a year. You’re going after that, right? They can’t do that. Say they can’t do that, Dad!” He cried, voice rising with panic. Sodapop jumped quickly into action, pulling Ponyboy into a tight hug. The fifteen year old had always been in charge of comforting the youngest.
“Hush, Pony. Let the grown-ups figure it out. They’ll figure it out, honey.” He thought he heard Soda whisper before Two-Bit kicked the coffee table over.
Two-Bit opened his mouth to say something, red with rage, then closed it and kicked the table again before storming out the door.
Darry almost wanted to laugh at the weirdness of it all. Just a few hours ago they were eating dinner and joking around without a care in the world.
“August first,” the woman on the television repeated. “On August first, an estimated 90,000 young men will be drafted to join the United States military in the ongoing conflict…”
August first. One month from today. One month. His internal voice echoed unhelpfully.
They had all taken it for granted. Months prior, Darry and his father had laughed in relief. He escaped the first round of the draft by five days. He thought he was safe. Now there was a very high chance that in a few more months, he could be on the other side of the world. Or dead.
He looked over to see silent tears slipping down his mothers face. This really scared him; Maggie Curtis was a strong woman. She never cried. He gently wrapped his arms around her, and she tucked her face into his collar, weeping quietly.
“Ma, it’s okay, I promise. I’ll be okay.” He said, resting his head on top of hers, staring blankly into nothing. “I promise, ma. I’ll be alright.”
She pulled back gently, tears still shining on her cheeks. She cupped his face in her hands, and looked up at her son. “When did you get all grown up, Darry?” She tried to smile, her bottom lip still wobbly. “I ain’t ready to let you go yet, baby. You’re still my baby.” A rough sob broke her sentence, and he pulled her back onto a hug, rubbing her back.
“Yeah, ma, I know. I know.”
His father’s knuckles were white from death-gripping the remote. Sodapop held a quietly crying Ponyboy in a tight embrace, gently carding his fingers through his hair. He looked like he was holding back tears himself, too. Darry hated this. He felt a strange guilt for putting them all through this, even though his voice of logic knew it wasn’t his fault. But most of all, he was scared. He didn’t want to go to war; he wanted to go back to school and make happy memories and finally get out of Tulsa and maybe settle down with a girl-
“Darry?” Sodapop called quietly. “You okay?”
“Yeah, yeah little buddy. I’m okay.” He replied softly, running a hand through his hair. No, I ain’t okay. I ain’t ever been less okay in my life. “You and Pony should head to bed, ‘kay?”
“Yeah, okay. Ya hear that, Pone?” His response was a weak nod. “Hold on tight, I’ll carry ya in.”
Ponyboy was real small for a twelve-year old. At first glance, he looked ten. Everybody knew he hated it, so the gang loved to tease him about it. He couldn’t be eighty pounds soaking wet, which allowed everybody to man-handle him.
“Darrel, put me down!”
Darry had always thought his kid brother spent too much time with his head in the clouds. He’d spent the whole day, the whole first day of summer, mind you, holed up in his room reading. It became Darry’s mission to add a new word to his genius brother’s vocabulary: fun.
“I swear, Darrel, I’ll scream. I’ll do it!” He hollered. Darry had ripped him out of bed and thrown him over his shoulder, walking out to the yard. He bounced as he walked down the porch stairs, and a laugh escaped his brother’s lips. Darry smiled.
“Is that the kid?” Two-Bit slinked over to them, grinning. “Horseboy takes a step out of his natural habitat? What’s his motive?” He drawled, imitating a guy from the Discovery channel.
“He was forced!” Ponyboy cried, trying to squirm out of Darry’s grip. “Darry, let me go!”
“Quit whinin’ like a baby.” Steve Randle complained from the ground, where he was sprawled out for some reason. “Before my eardrums fuckin’ explode.”
“Hey, don’t be swearin’ around the kiddies.” Dallas smirked, clearly trying to get a rise out of Pony.
“Hey, I ain’t no kid!” Pony yelled, insulted, causing everyone to laugh. Darry dropped him onto the grass, and he rubbed his side dramatically. “DARREL!!!”
“Lighten up, buddy. It’s summer, for Pete’s sake.” Darry smiled, ruffling the kid’s hair when he stood up. “Who’s up for some football?”
That had only been two weeks ago. Somehow, a lifetime passed in one night.
After Pony and Soda went to bed, Mr. Curtis led his wife to their room as well. Now, Darry laid in bed in the dark, staring at the ceiling. He had already given up on the idea of sleep, plagued with dark thoughts. He didn’t want to go to war. Darry Curtis Jr. already had plans. He was going places; Vietnam was not one of them. Or it wasn’t supposed to be. Sure, he would leave for college, but he would call home every weekend, visit for every holiday. He would miss his family if he was sent away. His parents, the gang, his annoying ass brothers.
“Darry?”
Darry rolled over haphazardly towards the door. It was barely open, a small sliver of light entering his room from the hallway. “Soda?”
The blonde fifteen year old tiptoed into the room, gently closing the door behind him.
Sodapop was a unique kid. He seemed to be able to read every person’s emotions the same way Ponyboy would read all those damn books. He could tell exactly what every person needed. Maybe that’s why he and Pony are so close, Darry thought. Pony’s so sensitive, and Sodapop loves knowing exactly what he needs and giving it to him all the time.
“What’s goin’ on, little buddy?” Darry murmured, sitting up. Soda huffed a sigh, and just hopped into bed next to him. Darry cautiously put an arm around his shoulder, and was relieved when Soda leaned into it. Darry had never been good with physical contact; he was awkward and stupid and didn’t know what to do or when. He was glad he guessed right this time; he tried to for both his brothers since they lived on it.
“Are you scared, Darrel?” Soda whispered, his head resting on his shoulder.
“I dunno.”
“Mhmmm… You can tell me the truth, y’know.”
“You suck.” Darry sighed. After a minute of silence, he admitted “Maybe just a bit…”
“Well, don’t be.” Soda said with so much confidence in his voice it made Darry want to laugh. “See, I was too, but then I got to thinkin’. The chances of you actually gettin’ picked are small, and they must weigh in that you’re plannin’ on goin’ to college next year. You’ll be fine, Dar.”
“That ain’t how it works, Soda. I wish it was, but it ain’t. It don’t matter that I’m goin’ to college a year and a half from now, I ain’t goin’ this year. Since half the guys my age are, that makes me twice as likely to be picked. I’m in a pretty shitty spot, man.”
He felt Soda stiffen beside him, and instantly felt guilty. “I’m sorry, Soda. I don’t mean to upset ya, that’s just the way it is.”
“Naw, it’s okay.” His voice quivered, and he let out a muffled sob.
“Aw, don’t cry, Pepsi. It’ll be alright.” Darry wrapped his other arm around his middle brother. Soda wore his heart on his sleeve, always.
“I don’t want you to leave.” He sniffled miserably.
“Hey, the draft ain’t for a month. There’s no reason to be worryin’ ‘bout this now, okay?”
“Kay…”
Darry swallowed dryly, feeling guilty for upsetting Soda. He hated to see Soda upset. “Is Pony asleep?”
“Um… I-I dunno. I’m pretty sure he was fakin’ when I stepped in. He always takes a while to fall asleep but…” He looked away, clearing his throat. “I’m worried about him. He’s gonna take this whole thing to heart, and I don’t have anything to say that’ll make him feel better.”
“You take good care of him, Sodapop. I’m real proud of you. Glory, I couldn’t do that for anyone.” Darry smiled, ruffling his hair.
“You take good care of me.” Soda murmured sleepily, snuggling into Darry’s side.
“M’kay, little buddy. Get some rest, will ya?”
“Can I stay with you?” He whispered, sounding younger than his age.
“Yeah, that’s okay.” Darry grunted, laying down. “‘Night, Pepsi.”
“‘Night, Dar. Love you.” He said, rolling over. Darry stretched out and closed his eyes. Maybe he’d get some sleep tonight after all.
Darry woke up at three in the morning, and he had to practically peel the covers off with how hot it was. Summer in Oklahoma was nasty, and it sure didn’t help that he had one brother, no, two brothers in his bed. Darry looked over, and apparently Ponyboy was here now too, sprawled out on top of Soda.
Weirdos, Darry thought to himself sarcastically. He couldn’t understand how anybody could possibly be comfortable like that. Darry liked his personal space while he was sleeping. He wasn’t sure if Ponyboy or Soda knew what personal space even meant. Soda’s arm was lazily wrapped around Pony’s shoulders, while Pony was hugging him with his head on Soda’s chest and his leg across his shins. Darry wasn’t quite sure how neither of them had died from the heat, huddled like that.
He stood up, stretching his left shoulder that had been giving him grief. He felt wide awake, the memories from last night rushing his mind. He was awake now, and he knew he wouldn’t fall back asleep. He had to leave for work in a few hours, anyway. He walked into the kitchen, and started some coffee, hoping to surprise his dad with a cup when he woke up.
He and his father would leave for work at 5:30, and his mother would probably use the morning to run errands. Sodapop would spend the day bumming around the DX, where his best friend Steve had started working in April when he turned sixteen. Soda had begged their parents to let him work there part time, but they insisted that fifteen was too young to have a job. He had spent half his summer there anyway, and Darry thought he might as well be getting paid for it. It’s not like they couldn’t use some extra money, but Darrel and Maggie Curtis’s pride was something else.
Ponyboy would probably stay home and read, like he’d do everyday of his life if given the chance. Sometimes Soda would drag him out and bring him somewhere, or Johnny would come over and they’d go out. Johnny was Ponyboy’s best friend, despite being closer in age to Soda and Steve. Johnny and Pony just understood each other. It made sense, they were both quiet kids. Maybe Two-Bit would make an appearance eventually as well, but he entertained himself for the most part. The real wild card would be Dallas Winston, because he was always one step away from the slammer, and so was anybody who was unfortunate enough to be with him. Darry would be surprised if they would make it through the summer without somebody getting arrested because of him, and he just hoped it wouldn’t be one of his brothers.
Darry sat down at the kitchen table, a warm coffee mug in his hands. His mother had completed all of the chores, so there was nothing to clean. He couldn’t turn on the radio or TV when everyone was sleeping, not that there’d be anything good on this early anyway. All he could do was sit with his thoughts.
Sodapop and Ponyboy would start school at the end of August, and Pony would be in high school. He was always the youngest in his grade, but at the end of the school year, his parents got a phone call that they wanted him to skip eighth grade. Now, a month after he turns thirteen, he’ll be a freshman. Darry could hardly believe it. Sodapop seemed excited about the prospect, which was good because Darry was worried it would upset him. Pony was almost three years younger, but he’d only be a grade below him in school. They could even be in some of the same classes. Darry knew Soda had a deep insecurity about his grades, which must have been really serious because Sodapop was never insecure about anything. Once, a couple years ago, they’d gotten into an argument. It was over something so stupid, Darry couldn’t even recall what it was about. But they’d gotten into it, and Darry took a jab at Soda failing two of his classes. Soda just got all quiet, and walked away. He hid in his room and cried for hours, with Ponyboy glaring daggers at him in the kitchen. But he seemed enthusiastic about Pony being in his school this year, so Darry thought there was nothing to worry about.
At about four, Darry heard a door creak open down the hall. He assumed it would be his Dad, but that was early, even for him. There were quick, light footsteps padding down the hall, and then there was Ponyboy, who froze when he saw Darry in the kitchen.
“Hey, Darry.” He said shyly, quietly, looking back down the hallway at the bedroom.
"What're you doing up so early, buddy?” Darry asked, and Ponyboy sat down on the opposite side of the table, drawing his knees to his chest.
“I just couldn’t fall back asleep.”
“Have a bad dream?”
“Yeah.” Pony said meekly, looking anywhere but at Darry.
“You remember it?” Pony just shrugged, and Darry let it go. He wasn’t the type to have touchy-feely conversations, anyway. They just sat there quietly for a while, and Darry was trying to figure out if the silence was awkward or not. “You want some coffee or somethin’?”
“I ain’t allowed to drink coffee.”
“Oh, right.”
Pony smiled a bit, and stood up. “I’m gonna sit on the porch. Sun’s coming up soon.”
“‘Kay. Dad’ll be up soon, I think.”
He nodded, and walked over to the door, but froze as his hand grabbed the knob. “Hey, Darry?”
“What’s up?”
He was quiet for a moment, thinking. Then he hesitantly asked, “Did you ever have bad dreams when you were younger?”
“No, I hardly ever dream of anything.” Darry answered, confused by the random question.
“Thought so.” He heard Pony whisper, and then he left.