hive_mind



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya dropped to his knees.

    The hardwood pressed sharply against him. Humility burned hot across his cheeks, but he forced himself to focus on Shane, who now looked absolutely horrified.

    “What? No. Get up,” Shane demanded.

    “No, no, is right grovelling position. I Googled it,” Ilya insisted quickly.

    “I fucked up. I broke us. I am so sorry. Take me back please.”

    (or Ilya’s humorous attempts at wooing back his ex.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,274
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    744
    Bookmarks:
    122
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    8,772

    16 Apr 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “-moya rybka, I am sorry, sweet girl-” Ilya is saying, on his knees in the middle of their living room and patting the rug near him with what looks like devastation on his face as Anya continues to ignore him, curled up on Shane’s lap instead. Fresh off of several stacked events to fit them into a weekend–because Shane’s mom is nothing if not efficient when it comes to the deals she makes–Ilya got home only a few minutes ago, still in the outfit he’d left his Buzzfeed puppy interview in, which Anya had clearly not appreciated, sniffing him suspiciously after her initial excited greeting and then retreating to Shane immediately when he patted his thigh in welcome.

    Shane is trying not to be obviously enjoying Ilya’s turmoil as much as he is, shifting Anya to lay on her back like a baby in one arm and cooing at her.

    “I know, huh? Papa left and played with who knows how many other dogs, and the whole time you were here missing him. I bet he wasn’t even thinking about you, huh?”

    “Hollander!” Ilya says, sounding scandalized. “Do not tell her that! Is not true!”

    (collection of standalone fics/ficlets prompted by my own tumblr posts) (will update as inspiration strikes)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,563
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    384
    Kudos:
    2,863
    Bookmarks:
    579
    Hits:
    38,611

    31 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    103,966
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    2,375

    31 Mar 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane is ready for a baby. He needs Ilya to be ready to get him pregnant. (Or Ilya having a crisis about his sperm count and making it everyone’s problem)

    Ilya: What are you wearing?
    Hayden: I assume that was meant for Shane?
    Ilya: No
    Ilya: Is for you
    Ilya: Do you have pants on?
    Hayden: What the fuck?

    [can be read as stand-alone]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,730
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    78
    Kudos:
    1,070
    Bookmarks:
    139
    Hits:
    19,488

    29 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    The problem was, Ilya couldn’t quite explain it himself. After a few minutes of ruminating, he finally settles on:

    Why do I want to eat my husband?

    Top result: Wife found guilty of cannibalising her husband, remains found in basement

    Ilya frowns down at his screen. Well that wasn’t it. He huffs quietly in frustration, before backspacing and trying again.

    Wanting to squish and bite my husband

    The search lags, and Ilya taps the tips of his thumbs impatiently against the screen, chewing on his bottom lip. Finally the page refreshes.

    Top result: Why boundaries in relationships are important

    Ilya rolls his eyes, on the verge of giving up.

    or

    Ilya has a severe case of cuteness aggression when it comes to his heavily pregnant husband, and he doesn’t quite know what to do about it.

    (+ now with bonus scenes of Shane and Ilya being dads!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,164
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    255
    Kudos:
    6,665
    Bookmarks:
    1,719
    Hits:
    107,673

    18 Mar 2026