Chapter Text
J slowly opened her eyes. She was there again. Stuck inside a black pit of… nothingness. She often wondered if this was what it was like to live inside of a black hole, if it were possible to survive such a journey, at least in reality, she would be spaghettified.
She looked around at the black void that encompassed her. She held a look of disinterest for a time and just hoped the experience would be over soon. Then, she heard something through the darkness. Something new to the experience. Something unlike the rest of her dreams, or nightmares. It was the sound of water dripping. A constant stream of drops landing atop a hard, metal floor. Following shortly was the sound of drills. Heavy machinery. A constant revving sound that scrambled her circuits. Then came the sound of metal. Like a metal mallet or a sledgehammer atop a rusted railroad spike.
Somehow, she could feel the darkness vibrate. It was an odd feeling. A sense of unease quickly took her.
Then came a voice. A muffled voice that echoed, then trailed off into nothingness.
“Request granted.” The voice rang. Its tone was high-pitched. Almost robotic. “You won’t remember what happened.” J backed up and covered her ears. Her instincts were telling her to run. A primal fear ran through her circuits. She wanted to run, but run where? She was trapped. Alone… again. “One caveat, though.” The voice continued after a brief silence. “You will not remember what happened, but you will remember these words. You will remember the fear. The sorrow. The regret. That way, you will know why you stay loyal. Why you stay by my side… no matter what. That is the deal. Sadistic giggle.”
“What deal?” J uttered. She got no response. All she heard were the noises as answers. The noises that echoed and rebounded insider her cocoon of loneliness. The feeling of fear only grew as the noises grew louder. As the feeling of isolation became heavier. She wanted to scream. She opened her mouth, but the noises had gotten so loud she was unsure if she was actually making any noise herself. Each drop of water or metal thud and clank rattled her insides.
She dropped to her knees and covered her ears.
Then, came a light.
In a flash it was over. Her eyes jolted open and her body jerked to life. Her body twitched as she adjusted quickly to her new environment. She tensed and twisted. With a single twist, she lost her grip on the wall and plummeted down to the ground. Luckily for her worn body, she hit the soft snow below. Her senses quickly returned. She was in the spire. And lucky for her, the noises had stopped just as quickly as her eyes opened. The constant ringing, however, did not.
J was content laying face first in the snow. She would prefer to fly back up to the darkest corner of the spire, but she knew she had work to do. Far more pertinent things to accomplish today. So, albeit reluctantly, J lifted her head and got to work.
The sun had just set below the horizon, allowing her to begin her list of things she wanted to get done. Though a short list, it was all she had. First, she wandered the wastes of the city. The buildings were more in ruin than usual, thanks to the Absolute Solver, or Cyn, practically tearing the planet to bits, if only for a short time.
The first thing she noticed as she wandered was the wind. It howled heavier than usual, but none of it bothered J. She actually enjoyed it. It was calming, unlike the metal grinding sounds in her nightmare. What did bother her was the silence. She released her wings and flew to the tallest building on the block. She sat and hung her legs over the edge for a moment and listened to the wind’s howl. It was, at the moment, the only thing to cleanse the dreaded silence. Above Copper 9 was a thick layer of clouds. So thick, not even the soft light from the distant celestial bodies were able to shine through.
After a few moments, she hovered back down to ground level and began digging through the scattered bodies of worker drones and old, worn and rusted vehicles. The technology of the humans before they were wiped from Copper 9 was not as advanced as her, nor her pod. So for the most part, the pieces she collected were useless. At best, some could be used to melt and mend together the plates of her pod.
She carried what scrap she could back to the spire and began to solder together the outer shell of her pod.
The pod itself was a wreck… thanks to Cyn. But, thanks to her tinkering skills, she had brought it from the brink of being just another scrap heap. She had most of the plating ready but saved the entire shell for last. She made sure all the ventilation tubes were good and ready and the electronics worked. For the most part, all the internal material was good. That is, until she came across the final problem of the night. Hopefully, it was her last.
It was the engine. In order for her to process enough power to get into the atmosphere, she would need a very particular piece. It is a piece that all worker drones contained within them to run their bodies at the high level, but she had looked and looked again through the corpses. Each one had either been too badly destroyed for safe use or was missing entirely. She groaned and slumped onto the snow once again.
She looked up only when she heard a new sound. This one was small. Like tiny feet scuttering across metal. It was a keybug, and it was looking at her. J sat there and eyed the little thing, wondering how it would taste. She licked her lips, but the little critter didn’t move. It showed no signs of fear. J groaned again, finally forcing herself to admit the harsh truth.
She had lost her fear factor.
To most people, that would be a good thing. She could put on her puppy dog eyes and walk up to the worker drone colony, knock on the doors, and apologize profusely. Hopefully, due to her lack of intimidation, she would get let in and all would be forgiven. That was off the table. Call it pride. Call it insanity. Call it stubbornness or reality. It wasn’t going to happen.
The longer the keybug stared, the more insecure J became. She flashed her claws, and once again, the bug did not move. It was like it was judging her. At least, that’s the vibe she got from the little critter.
“What?!” She hissed. “Stop that.” The critter continued to stare. “I said stop! What are you looking at me for? I don’t have to justify my actions to you. Is that what you want? You’re just a damn bug! Oh, poor J Look at me. Boo-freaking-hoo. Happy? Now get lost.” She waved the bug away, but it didn’t move. “Scram.” It stayed put. “I did what I had to do. I’ve always done what I had to do! Just leave me alone!!” J spread her wings and tore out of the spire like a flash of lightning. She ignored the fact she had lost an argument to a silent keybug.
She clambered atop the spire. Her claws dug into the corpses that littered the mass. She scanned the horizon. Despite the thick and heavy snow, she saw the lights of the worker drone colony. Once, they had dared not shine their lights. They remained hidden, but that was a long time ago. That was when she was still feared. Now, she was sure they saw her as nothing more than a joke. A punching bag. She roared and sped off north in the opposite direction.
Towards a more memorable, happy place. For J’s standards, at least.
It was another bunker fifty miles north of the colony N and V now called home. The other bunker was merely a small cave system beneath a hill. It didn’t look like much on the outside and didn't have much decor value on the inside, but it was pretty expansive. When they arrived on Copper 9, the worker drones were quick to realize putting up a fight was useless. So, they hid. One of the first and largest colonies had been this one. Now, each and every one of them were long dead and their corpses had helped tremendously with the spire’s construction.
Now, J returned occasionally. For one room, and one room only.
Sitting in the middle of the room was a chair. Worn and torn with oil stains all around, but it was comfy enough. On the other end of the room was a small, antique television. J sat down on the chair and instinctually checked the door behind her. It was a habit to make sure V and N weren’t watching. Those times were long gone.
J huffed and forced a smile. “I don’t need them, anymore.” She said, kicking her feet on the wooden table between her and the television. “Life is looking up.”
She picked up the remote and flipped on the television. She had forgotten what she was watching last, but whatever it was had been paused. So, she restarted the movie, sat back, and enjoyed the film.
Or, tried to, at least. Halfway through, she realized her mistake. It was one of those films where the good characters win because of the power of friendship. J began to internally cringe as the movie progressed. She immediately felt uncomfortable, and the feeling only intensified when she watched the secondary villain of the movie get cast aside like nothing. As she watched the villain fall to her death, she realized that out of all the characters, she was the one she sympathized with the most.
A sudden rage burned deep within her. She huffed, tore herself out of her chair, and kicked a gigantic hole in the television. Her rampage didn’t stop there. Her claws cut the room to shreds. The couch. The walls. The broken television and the small wooden table.
She growled like a feral beast.
Beast? She thought. Then, it clicked. “At least I know what I am.”
A beast.
She left the compound in a hurry but found herself tripping over a strange object half buried in snow just outside the front door. It was a wicker basket. Inside were a few jars of oil. More than enough to keep her alive for another few months. On the bottom was a note. She picked it up and realized it wasn’t just a note. It was a drawing.
N’s drawing. He had gotten better.
It depicted three figures holding hands. N, V, and herself. All that was written was a simple phrase.
Think of the good times.
J crumbled the paper, took the jars of oil, and released her wings. Damn him. Damn this planet. Damn friendship.
“They won by the power of friendship?!” N roared to life. Uzi was taken aback as N raised his arms wide in joy. She tumbled from the bed and landed on her head. “So sorry!” N roared, reaching down and helping his girlfriend back onto the bed.
“N?” Uzi groaned as she rubbed her head. “How many times have we watched this movie?”
N shrugged. “Only…” N began to count using his fingers, but upon realizing the absurd number, he opted not to answer. So, N went silent in defeat.
“And you’re still surprised?”
N laughed. “I guess it’s just fun to see, y’know? It makes my circuits feel all fuzzy inside. Happy endings all around!”
“Gross…” Uzi groaned.
N saw her inner goth come out. Each time, N would react in a way that no drone that had murdered thousands would normally act. He pulled Uzi close, wrapping his arms around her body and giving her a whopping kiss on the cheek.
“Where’s the smile? Where is it?!” He laughed.
Uzi laughed back. “Stop. Stop!” She playfully patted N down like an out-of-control puppy dog. "You're ridiculous!" N eventually allowed Uzi her space and laid back down on the bed.
“Groan. Gross.” Cyn, as Uzi’s tail, butted in. “Like… ew.”
“Bite me.” Uzi hissed back. “Don’t make me get the duct tape again.”
“Annoyed expression.” Cyn said, then fell silent. Little did Cyn know; Uzi had run out of tape.
With the silence came an aura that made Uzi feel uncomfortable. She looked up at N and spoke softly. Her tone was serious.
“N?” She whispered softly.
“Yep?” N propped his head up and looked over at Uzi. He immediately knew something was off.
“You’ve been taking gift baskets to J again, haven’t you?”
N scoffed. “Wha- Why… I- Well…” N rubbed the back of his neck hoping to alleviate some of the pressure. He had hoped the words could come out smooth, but a tight knot formed in his throat. He sat there in silence, which confirmed to Uzi of the truth.
“It’s not a bad thing, N, and I’m not mad.” Uzi reassured him. “It’s just… she’s gone. She doesn’t want anything to do with us or this colony. You know that, right? You’ve given her chance after chance, and you’ve been met with nothing but silence.” N once again tried to speak, but no founds came from his mouth. “I just don’t want to see you upset or heartbroken when she does get that pod working and… leaves.”
N’s inability to speak was soon broken. His eyes softened. “I know.” He whispered. His voice trembled.
With that awkward chat out of the way, Uzi and N opted for two more movies. Romantic comedies, of course. N got a kick out of them and Cyn absolute despised them. While not her favorite, Uzi was beginning to slowly grow a fondness for certain aspects of them. Back before N, she couldn’t relate to anything or anyone in the movies. Now with N at her side, she realized she identified a lot more with the couples on the screen which enhanced the experience.
Once the credits of the final movie rolled, N and Uzi readied their backpacks and wandered out into the halls of the bunker. The two held hands firmly. It was their first time showing physical affection towards one another in public. Luckily, the halls were relatively empty.
Curiosity struck hard and heavy as they passed Lizzy’s room. She hadn’t seen V in a while, so Uzi slowed down. Through the doors, she heard laughter. N was oblivious to Uzi’s intentions, but she preferred it that way. She cackled, and just when she had heard enough, the door opened quickly. Out stepped Lizzy. Their eyes immediately locked, and Uzi knew she was busted.
“The hell?” Lizzy groaned.
Then, to make matters even more awkward, out stepped V. She eyed Uzi with a hint of mistrust.
Uzi was too slow to act natural, but that didn’t stop her from trying.
“What are you two doing?” Lizzy continued.
“Snooping.” N accidentally ratted Uzi out.
“N?!” V fumed. “Weird.”
“Lay off.” Uzi chimed in. “I needed the blackmail.”
“At least we try to keep it behind closed doors.” V’s eyes shot down at Uzi and N’s hands, still locked tight. “Besides, it was just movie night. I’m sure you two were doing the same. So… yeah.”
“Giggle.” Cyn giggled. “I get the best gossip. Best seat in the house. Hit me up one day, V. I will share all.”
“Cyn?!” Uzi almost erupted. “I swear… to robo-jesus.”
“Let the hate flow through you. Topic reference.” Cyn said.
Uzi turned towards N. “N? Next time you’re out, could you scavenge for a new roll of duct tape?”
N saluted. “Of course!”
“And don’t make it an excuse to drop more stuff for her.” Uzi refrained from using the name, but it was clear to everybody who she was referring to.
“He’s been dropping stuff of for J again?” V looked up at N. The immediate sadness and regret in his puppy dog eyes confirmed to V without a word being uttered.
“It… It’s fine.” Uzi once again reassured N. “Just… a waste of good oil. And paper.” She ended with a grumble.
“Look…” V said with a hefty sigh. “J…” Upon seeing N’s eyes dim even more, V had a choice to make. She picked her next words very carefully. “Maybe we can talk with Mr. Doorman.”
“What?” Uzi’s eyes shot open wide.
V ignored her and simply continued. “He has some sway on what happens in this bunker. Look, N, if you really want to keep trying to get J back… then let’s talk to him.”
“Woah!” Uzi roared. “I’m all on board with getting J back even though I think the attempts are pointless, but going to my dad might not be the best idea.”
“Why?” N asked. “Look, if the drones in this base can forgive me and V, then surely they can forgive J, too. We just have to speak in a way that gets his attention.”
V nodded. “If we can get the entire colony on board, maybe she’ll be more tempted to join? Even when it was just the three of us in the spire, it honestly got a little lonely. I can’t imagine what it’s like completely alone.”
N looked at Uzi. His eyes seemed to swell as his excitement grew. “All we have to do is present it in the best way possible!”
They failed. Hard.
“You want me to forgive the drone that brutally attacked my wife?” Khan said with a stare that would shake the plates of any drone.
“She what?” N was baffled. He had missed that part of the story.
“I know it was this... J girl who was the one who stabbed my precious Nori with her nanite acid. Melting her body and leaving her a shell of her former self.”
“A sexy shell.” Nori corrected, scrambling on top of Khan’s head to rest.
“The answer is no.” Khan said.
N shrugged as he turned towards Uzi. “Hey, I guess there was no harm in asking, right?”
Khan smiled and continued to speak nonchalantly. “In fact, I am so full of a desire for revenge that I am actually going to form a group to hunt down threats to the colony. Thank you for inspiring me!”
“Eh?” N’s eyes hollowed.
“We can call it the Worker Drone Strike Force! W.D.S.F for short.” Without another word, Khan strode like a champ down the hall, vanishing around a corner.
“Crap.” V uttered.
“No harm, huh?” Uzi was not impressed.
J barged into the spire. She had a sudden urge. A deep desire. She raced into her pod and dug through a few compartments, emptying the contents in a rush to find what she needed.
“C’mon. C’mon! Where are they? GAH! Where are they?!”
A relived smile sprouted across her face as she found her paper and JCJenson branded pen. Though she had to admit that drawing in pencil was much easier, she was unable to give up her pen. Her precious, precious pen. She pranced like a school kid around the interior of the pod, raking together a few other materials and shuffling items around to make room for her art station.
She pulled up her chair and began to draw. Her head was steady as it glided across the paper. What was once a blank canvass with endless possibilities quickly became something of magic. Her eyes widened as her imagination left her head and found its way onto the paper.
Then, reality struck.
Her circuits fried. What had I made?! It was all wrong. Her heart sank. Rage was quickly replaced with sadness as she looked at what she had done. Crooked eyes. Lopsided posture. One arm freakishly out of proportion to the other. She winced, crumpled up the paper, and threw it away. Again, she wanted to scream. Had I really lost my touch?
Ever since the battle with Cyn, J’s world has fallen apart. Nothing was right. Even regular routines felt off. Different. She was about to slam her fists into the desk, but something inside her told her to refrain. For once, she actually listened. Instead, she laid her head gently on the desk and groaned.
She sat still for a few minutes when she detected something. A soft noise. She looked up and saw the keybug carry her drawing away. But, that wasn’t the noise. No… The noise was further away. Something outside the pod. Her eyes widened. In a flash, she tore out of her pod and flew high into the air. Back into the darkness at the top of the spire. She sat there and watched. Listened as the noise grew louder and louder.
“Hello?!” It was N. “J? I… I saw footprints out in the snow and I figured you were in here.” N walked into the spire. In his hand was another wicker basket. “I just want to talk. There’s something I think you should know.” A moment of silence followed, as if he was actually expecting a response. J was not even tempted to give him one. “Hello?” Another long, drawn-out silence. “Okay. Well, I’ll have to catch you later, then.” N set the wicker basket down, spread his wings, and flew out of the spire.
J remained cast in shadow for a solid ten minutes afterwards. Her eyes beamed down from the darkness, as if she was setting up an ambush for a worker drone. Good times, she thought.
A few more minutes passed and J finally crawled from the darkness. She flew down and landed beside the basket. Of course, there was more oil and… another drawing. She picked it up. He had gotten really good.
If his previous drawing consisted of what they had in the past, then his new drawing was about what they could still have in the future. This time, it was N, V, and herself along with Uzi and presumably a few of the worker drones they had befriended. The words this time were simple.
It’s never too late.
J suddenly felt cluttered inside the spire. She needed air. Fresh air. She flew out of the mass of corpses, making sure not to make too much noise so she wouldn’t draw N back. She found a spot, perched at the top of the spire. The clouds had finally dispersed, revealing the billions of stars and the two enormous celestial bodies that hovered above.
She smiled and closed her eyes.
Slowly, she began to hum. She hummed a tune she had long lost the lyrics to. When they were still a team, her and V would sing. It was one of the few times J had felt truly comfortable given the crummy situations they were constantly put through. As she hummed the solemn tune, she tried hard to remember the lyrics.
But… they never came. Only fragments. Pieces. Still, she got lost in the moment. Her soft hum died down and was replaced the howl of the wind. She turned her head.
“Take it away, V.” And the moment was lost. She opened her eyes and looked up at the sky with sadness. “Oh, yeah…” She sighed. “You’re not here.”
You’re not here? She could’ve chuckled if not for the overwhelming weight on her chest.
That was the main verse of the tune.