MadlyManic



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    Looking across the room to where Troy is on the floor playing with Chiron, Harris starts flailing his arms under the table in the other man’s general direction. He attempts to do this in a manner that won’t alert Ilya, though it probably looks absolutely insane to Troy, who remains oblivious to his distress and need for another set of eyes on this Zoom situation.

    “So you like the idea?” he asks.

    “Not bad. Maybe call it Quaran-team with the Cens?” Ilya floats.

    He continues somehow, and with great effort, to spitball names for the initiative while watching the half-naked guy behind Ilya move through an incredibly acrobatic yoga routine, head remaining just off camera.

    **The pandemic sucks. It raises Shane’s anxiety through the roof, but it also lends him a new point of view, a small existential crisis, if you will… life is too short to keep hiding his love for Ilya. So Shane and Ilya decide to just screw it and be less uptight about protecting their secret. They’re in lockdown anyway, what could happen? Or, five times Shane and Ilya have a Zoom mishap, and one time it’s not accidental at all.

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    29 Aug 2026

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    NHL Enthusiast @hockey4life
    This is officially the weirdest day in All Of Hockey

    Ily-a @ilyahoezenov
    So we’re agreed that they’re not actually getting married right. Like something else is going on
    Hayden Pike’s 5th Child @heydenpike
    Well obviously Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov aren’t actually getting married, they’ve obviously been fucking with us all day

    Or:
    What if Shane and Ilya decide to explode the internet by letting their friends post about their wedding, before anyone knows they're together. A chaotic way to come out if they could do it on their own terms.

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    26 Aug 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 23

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    “When you said we should go on a road trip, I thought ‘Wow, Shane Hollander is so fun and not boring. I cannot believe it took me two years of marriage to see this.’ But then I learn the road trip goes through Texas, big, boring state of nothing.” Ilya shook his head gravely, as though he had never heard of a more unforgivable offense. “And that my husband insists on this because he wants to see a gas station. As if Canada does not have gas stations on every corner for him to fill up his boring car. But no, this gas station has ‘clean bathrooms,’ Ilya intoned with air quotes, “and an ugly rodent in a stupid hat, so we have to go. And I realize I am tricked. Of course road trip is secretly boring. Hollander will find a way.”

    -

    Hollanov experiencing Buc-ee’s in all of its glory

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    14 Aug 2026

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    “Ah.”

    “‘Ah’,” Ilya repeats, giving him a look before he looks back to the tidily stacked frozen mouse packages in the freezer and makes a face as a little badly-hidden shudder moves through him. “Why the fuck do you have mice in your freezer, Shane? You are doing serial killer shit now? This is why you have cottage in the middle of nowhere? For serial killer things?”

    “It’s for Spaghetti,” Shane says.

    Ilya gives him an absolutely horrified look at that and turns a little green, which makes him remember that Spaghetti isn’t just his snake's name.

    “Not food!” He rushes to explain. “Not food spaghetti! Snake Spaghetti!”

    “What the fuck are you even saying right now,” Ilya says, looking honestly a little concerned that Shane might have something going wrong in his head.

    (Distancing himself from almost twenty years of owning a snake, Shane can indeed see why this situation might be a little alarming for someone on the outside looking in.)

    (It also clues him in to the fact that maybe it’s not just Spaghetti who should have gotten a little adjustment period.)

    (in which i give shane allergies AND a snake)

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    22 Jul 2026

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    “Go?” Rozanov repeats, and Shane thinks he manages to nod, thinks he manages to spin some kind of excuse that he knows Rozanov doesn’t really buy, but he needs to go. He needs to get out of here. He needs to find somewhere quiet and calm where he can ride out this panic and painful tightness until he can catch his breath again. He needs-

    He needs to go.

    “I’m sorry,” he says, turning heel and resisting the urge to just book it right for the front door only because he’d rather not have to explain to Hayden why he returned from a hookup with Boston Lily in men’s clothes that he certainly didn’t leave in.

    It’s not until he makes it halfway up the stairs to Rozanov’s bedroom that it occurs to him in a cold rush that it isn’t just anxiety that makes it this hard to breathe.

    “No,” he tells himself firmly, white knuckling the bannister and trying to take a deep breath just to prove that he can.

    It wheezes.

    (how the tuna meltdown is averted through the power of food allergies and anaphylaxis)

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    21 Jul 2026