colddeadqueer

Pale, dark haired digital portrait. Lesbian flag in the background.



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  1. Rec *

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    Summary

    Shane Hollander is hockey’s closeted golden boy with everything to hide. Ilya Rozanov is a professional Dom with everything to lose and an expired visa.

    Through their arrangement at a discreet Montreal kink bar, where NDAs protect secrets and sessions are charged per hour, they discover the most dangerous thing isn’t being caught—it’s wanting more than those hours allow.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    170,923
    Chapters:
    13/?
    Collections:
    14
    Comments:
    15,860
    Kudos:
    30,429
    Bookmarks:
    12,464
    Hits:
    1,204,668

    06 Apr 2026

  2. Rec *

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    Summary

    “This one is almost full,” Ilya said from across the living room. He was holding something up.

    They’d both ditched their jackets and rolled up their sleeves, so Shane’s eyes followed the line of Ilya's arm: shoulder, to bent elbow, to bare forearm, to wrist, to hand. Ilya’s fingers were wrapped around the neck of a champagne bottle. Shane wasn’t really certain how many there had been lying around–Yuna and David had been in charge of handling refreshments–but an open, nearly-full bottle indicated that perhaps there had been too much.

    “Bring it here and I’ll dump it out.”

    “Dump it out?” Ilya frowned, crossing the living room towards the kitchen. “And waste it?”

    “What would you rather do?”

    Ilya set the bottle on the counter and came up behind Shane, strong arms slinking around his waist, Ilya’s lips just barely brushing against his ear. It wasn’t surprising–they’d both been a little clingy ever since the ceremony.

    “I want to share it with you.”

    Shane and Ilya's wedding night, after the guests have gone home, and a bit of the day after.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,763
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    178
    Kudos:
    2,215
    Bookmarks:
    506
    Hits:
    23,751

    30 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    He loves this. It’s so fucking nice to just shrug everything off and put himself in Shane’s hands. The collar is a comfortable, familiar weight around his throat. He doesn’t even realize he’s got one wrist clamped in his hand behind his back until he feels nails digging in. Everything about him rests squarely with Shane Hollander.

    Shane and Ilya indulge at the cottage.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,257
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    1,476
    Bookmarks:
    281
    Hits:
    19,445

    29 Mar 2026

  4. Rec *

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    Summary

    There had been a tragedy. The Ottawa Centaurs' plane had crashed in northern Georgia, during the course of their flight from Carolina to Tampa. They didn't know much else yet. All NHL activities were suspended for the next seven days.

    Wait, what?

    At seventeen, Shane Hollander met the love of his life. At twenty-nine, gravity took him away.

    Shane wishes he’d died, too.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,740
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    1,455
    Kudos:
    11,326
    Bookmarks:
    3,221
    Hits:
    195,505

    26 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Hayden knew he wasn’t stupid.

    Well, not completely. Well, he felt like he was pretty smart about some things, and, okay, a little oblivious about others. Still, he liked to think he was pretty far from stupid—especially when compared to his fellow hockey players.

    Like, he’d known that Shane had that off-and-on thing with that girl in Boston, Lily, for years. He didn’t know much more than that, and he especially didn’t know why Shane was so cagey about it, but his best friend was admittedly pretty weird about everything.

    -

    Slight AU where Shane comes out to Hayden and J.J. around the time he breaks up with Rose, but Lily's identity remains a secret. For now.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,071
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    107
    Kudos:
    7,331
    Bookmarks:
    1,000
    Hits:
    37,002

    18 Mar 2026