sohelpmegod



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    Shane’s hearing is muffled, sound bubbling in and out like he’s swimming through the lake, dipping under the surface and back into the air. He can make out a word here and there, enough to know that Rozanov is trying to get him to breathe with him. He can feel the expansion of Rozanov’s lungs against his hands as he takes deep breaths in and lets them out. Shane tries to copy him, he does, but every inhale carries the scent of him, his cologne, his skin, his hair products. The scents are so familiar to him, and he wants more than anything for them to calm him, make him feel safe, but they are doing the opposite. Why are they still so familiar to him after not being anywhere near Rozanov for half a year? Why does he still want to shove his face against Rozanov’s throat and suck in every last last hint he can get?

    -

    Ilya takes longer to arrive in the bathroom after they present the award together, leaving Shane time to sink into a full-blown panic attack. This leads to a very different night in Vegas and an earlier beginning to Shane and Ilya’s relationship.

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    English
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    1/1
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    28 Mar 2026

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    "Now," the announcer says, "Let’s head over to the recap of Women’s Figure Skating, where the nineteen-year-old from the United States was able to snatch the gold in a stunning upset from the frontrunner, Russian Individual Neutral Athlete, eighteen-year-old Irina Rosanov.”

    And there she is, in a pink rhinestoned costume, gargling water and spitting it out of perfectly painted lips. Hands on hips, taking deep breaths before skating out onto the ice.

    Shane’s hand is immediately on the remote, moving to change the channel.

    “It’s fine,” Ilya says, “Want to see.”

    He tries not to keep track of her career, but when it's playing on the screen like this, it's hard to look away. She is the spitting image of his mother, curly blonde hair, lithe frame, piercing blue eyes. She is her namesake. And he doesn’t know her at all.

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    Or, Ilya's niece receives her trust fund. She comes looking for answers (and finds a home, while she's at it).

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    21 Mar 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    So cute

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    Popup tooltips that work well on both desktop (hover) and mobile (tap open and close). Constrained width, so best for short tooltips or translations for a couple words at the most.

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    Language:
    English
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    1,201
    Chapters:
    2/2
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    40
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    358
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    20 Mar 2026

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    He doesn’t mean for it to happen that way. He sees the asphalt before he reaches it.

    He thinks, Ilya.

    He doesn’t remember much after that.

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    SHANE HOLLANDER, CAPTAIN OF MONTREAL METROS, FOUND UNRESPONSIVE AFTER FALLING FROM APARTMENT BALCONY
    The incident occurred mere hours after rumors of the hockey star’s sexuality started circulating, stemming from an online video of a private conversation between the young captain and actress Rose Landry. There is no update on his current status after being moved to…

    Or, Shane gets outed and accidentally hurts himself, the world thinks he's tried to end his life, and Ilya struggles to come to terms with mortality in more than one sense of the word.

    Language:
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    20 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    In Vegas, after they’d said everything right up to the edge of I love you, Shane and Ilya came up with a plan. It was long term, with many, many steps. There might be a spreadsheet somewhere that Shane won’t admit to.

    But it’s a plan, nonetheless. Over the summer of 2014, they tweak it and add things important to the both of them. There are even many, extensive, contingency plans.

    OR

    Thanks to Shane's small lie the first time they hooked up, Shane and Ilya are together years earlier. Now, they have to figure out what to do about it.

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    English
    Words:
    95,714
    Chapters:
    14/14
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    2,784
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    19 Mar 2026