stilladoringyou



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    That thought settles into his brain dangerously. Ilya’s been with everyone. Girls. Guys. Others. What's another person on the list?

    If Shane wants experience…

    If he wants to stop feeling behind…

    Why not Ilya?

    Yes, he was a complete asshole that Shane wished he could choke to death sometimes and his brother's childhood bestfriend, but it wouldn’t mean anything. It's for the experience, the education of it all.

    For hockey.

    Obviously.

    Or: Ilya Rozanov has always been Shane Hollander’s older brother’s best friend. He was never supposed to become Shane’s first everything.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,737
    Chapters:
    11/12
    Comments:
    931
    Kudos:
    4,128
    Bookmarks:
    1,613
    Hits:
    122,936

    18 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane Hollander only goes to the café near the rink because his daughter loves the hot chocolate.

    The fact that Ilya Rozanov remembers Louise’s order, gives her free cookies, and looks suspiciously happy whenever they walk in is completely irrelevant.

    Louise, however, seems to think the barista would fit perfectly into their little family.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,133
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Comments:
    126
    Kudos:
    1,489
    Bookmarks:
    384
    Hits:
    13,904

    18 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya does not have time for this. It’s almost incredible, and frankly humiliating, how fast his anger has been extinguished by burning worry. Shane’s right, he should be furious. But that’s not Ilya’s priority, now. ‘’Hollander, are you listening, yes?’’, Ilya insists. He confusedly stares at his reflection on the window. When did he even got up from the couch? ‘’Where are you?’’, he repeats, stressing on every word with a careful pause.

    Shane seems intentioned to ignore Ilya’s bleeding questions like’s a sacred mission. Just to make his heart dry out from paranoia, probably. The silence is broken by a sniff, followed by a gulp. Shane sounds now far from the phone: 

    ‘’Rose. Rose, he’s mad’’, he moans in a strangled whisper. 

    Ilya’s body freezes. 

     

    Or, Shane and Rose break up, and they’re up to celebrations. Rose decides it’s time for Shane to distract himself for a night. It absolutely doesn’t go as planned.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,794
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    104
    Kudos:
    2,762
    Bookmarks:
    549
    Hits:
    21,924

    17 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You are planning to rob me or what?” He hears Rozanov call, and he can’t help but smile slightly even as he rolls his eyes, closing the door to the linen closet and feeling strangely lighter than when he opened it, reassured that he’s just trying to read into a blank page, that today doesn’t mean anything more than Rozanov doesn’t mind him being around, which is strangely flattering.

    “I don’t know,” he calls back. “Don’t Russians like diamonds and fur and stuff? Where should I start looking if I want to know what my options are?”

    He hears Rozanov laugh, and it makes him smile.

    When he joins him in the living room once more, Rozanov tugs him down to lean against him again. Shane goes easier this time, settling into it, knowing it doesn’t mean anything other than the fact that he just happens to be the closest warm body, the person on Rozanov’s roster who filled today’s slot.

    (the tuna meltdown doesn't happen) (this does not mean they get ANY better at communication)

    (or: how shane didn't realize he had a boyfriend for several months)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,094
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    752
    Kudos:
    11,082
    Bookmarks:
    3,197
    Hits:
    86,204

    08 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane hasn’t been new on a team since his rookie season. He hasn’t had to walk into a locker room full of guys he doesn’t know since he was nineteen. That first year in Montreal had been one of the most exhausting of his life, and the hockey had been the least of it.

    Boston’s locker room will be easier than Montreal's, Shane thinks. Hopes.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,262
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    772
    Kudos:
    5,316
    Bookmarks:
    688
    Hits:
    45,633

    07 May 2026