Chapter Text
“That boy is gay.”
Will jumped at Robin’s whisper two centimeters from his ear as they left the movie theater into the chilly night. “Robin!” he hissed. Sure, the crowd was loud, and Mike and Vickie were talking about something a good five feet ahead of them, but still.
“I had to say something!” she excused, holding her hands up in mock surrender. “My god, Will, the way he looks at you?”
“Stop it,” Will pleaded, knowing whatever he said would fall on deaf ears. He had been literally asking for this, after all, when he called Robin earlier that day and begged her to help him introduce Mike Wheeler to other gay people. He’d wanted Mike to see and feel what he’d seen and felt when he met Robin in freshman year. He wanted to see how reacted.
“He kept glancing at you whenever Frank was on screen.”
“Robin.”
“And that’s most of the movie, dude.”
Will watched Mike’s back, his freckled arms miming something that made Vickie laugh. Mike had called him beautiful. “Did he really look at me that much?”
“Would I ever lie to you?”
“No, but you might fall prey to wishful thinking.”
Robin crossed her arms defiantly. “I am an honest observer.”
Will groaned, drooping sideways until he bumped against her. “What am I supposed to do, Rob?”
She bumped him back. “Make a move, my friend.”
The idea alone terrified him. “Something from the Robin Buckley playbook?”
“Nah, that one is blatant plagiarism of the Steve Harrington original. Use your own.”
“I don’t have my own,” Will reminded her.
“Then just be yourself,” Robin decided, pushing him forward. “Good luck!”
He stumbled forward, still a little tipsy, and ran right into Mike’s back. Robin was a cruel, cruel friend. “Sorry!”
Mike turned and caught him by the arm, smiling a little. “Hey there.”
“Hi.”
Vickie had fallen back into step with Robin, so it was just the two of them leading the way back to the apartment. Will needed to get his shirt before they went back to Berkeley – there was no way he was riding the train in his current outfit. He could hardly believe he wore it in the theater.
But Mike had called him beautiful. So maybe it was worth it.
“What did you think of the movie?” he asked.
“Pretty punk rock,” Mike answered. “Are there always that many people yelling, though?”
“It’s a call and response thing!” Will defended. “Makes it fun.”
“I didn’t say it wasn’t fun,” Mike pointed out. “I just didn’t expect it.”
“Every cult needs some mantras.”
“Much better kind of cult.”
“Exactly.” Mike’s arm brushed his, their steps falling into sync. Their hands were so close. “Do you think we should include any aliens in our book? You know, like the Transylvanians?”
“Seems like a lot of elements, but we could make it work.”
“Maybe we’ll save that idea for the next one.” Was this his movie? Suggesting writing a book series together? Seriously? “I always liked drawing rockets.”
“Yeah, I remember.” The fondness in Mike’s voice made his heart skip a beat. He couldn’t do this. He could not do this.
“Hey, Robin?” he called over his shoulder. “Remind me where we’re going again?”
He managed to keep Robin and Vickie in the conversation for the rest of the walk back to their apartment, a buffer between him and Mike and all the nerves writhing around in his gut.
Will had been flirted with twice in his entire life – that you’ve noticed, Robin liked to say. Once by a girl in high school history, who he fearfully avoided until graduation. Once by a very drunk teammate of Lucas’, who pulled him into an empty office at a house party and threatened to beat the shit out of him if he told anyone. Will had been quite drunk himself, feeling very out of place after watching Max and Lucas giggle the night away, and figured that was the best things were going to get for him. He let the guy kiss him.
Never had he felt for anyone what he felt for Mike Wheeler. Never had the stakes been so high.
Thankfully, by the time they left Robin and Vickie’s apartment to catch the late train back to Berkeley, both he and Mike seemed to be feeling the lateness to the same degree. It was well past two in the morning. They fell into a comfortable silence, next to each other on the train. The train that shuddered rhythmically beneath them, the chugging of the wheels against the tracks almost hypnotic.
Will woke up with his head on Mike’s shoulder, which he could have been fine with except his hand was also resting on Mike’s thigh. He jolted up and yanked his hand to his chest, whipping around to meet Mike’s eyes. Mike was laughing at him, just a little snicker under his breath.
“Relax, Will.”
“Sorry,” he said instinctively.
“You’re fine,” Mike assured, smiling the same soft smile that had hardly left his face since they left the theater. “This is our stop, though.”
They exited the train with a few other late-night stragglers and made their way out to the street. Will kept flexing his hand awkwardly.
Try as he might to keep a sensible distance on the walk towards his apartment, Mike kept absentmindedly veering into him, bumping their shoulders together or causing their knuckles to brush. It was a miracle he didn’t explode before they made it to his street.
“This is me,” he said when they reached the front of his building, very much not wanting to leave Mike’s company.
“Right,” said Mike. He stopped next to him and glanced up, then back down at Will, shoving his hands into his pants pockets. “I guess I’ll see you later, then.”
“Later,” Will echoed. He didn’t move. Mike didn’t either. This was an opportunity, right? Something that Robin would be yelling at him to take. But they were out on the street, where anyone could pass by. Someone could be looking through a window at them right now.
It was Mike who stepped forward first, reaching out to place a hand on the side of Will’s neck. His thumb hovered over his jaw, the lightest touch. Will inhaled shakily. Oh god.
“Why’d you leave?” Mike asked quietly, his gentle dark eyes tracing up Will’s face. His brows were pinched in the middle, his twitching. “Yesterday.”
I don’t know, Will wanted to say, but that was a lie. He didn’t like lying to Mike. He reached up and wrapped his hand around the arm Mike held up to his face instead, holding him there.
“I’m trying to figure you out, Will,” Mike pressed on, “but I’m getting a little lost.”
“Welcome to my world,” Will said, trying for a smile. Then, with a flicker of confidence he didn’t know he had, he turned his head and pressed a kiss to Mike’s palm. “It’s a little scary sometimes. Especially when you’re out in the open.”
“Why else would you move to San Franscisco?”
Will snorted, shaking his head against Mike’s hand. “Exact-”
A car whizzed by the street beside them, honking and yelling something he didn’t quite catch. He flinched out of Mike’s hold, dropping his hands to his sides and stepping back so quickly he ran into the wall of his apartment building.
“Fuck!” Mike swore, holding his own hand to his chest like he’d been burned. His attention followed the car down the street until it turned a corner and disappeared. It was too dark for Will to gauge his exact expression. “Fuck,” he repeated, like an exhale.
Will stayed slumped against the wall, tilting his head back so he wouldn’t cry. Of course something like that would happen. Of course the world would come to crush the first little bit of hope he’d ever had. “Yeah.”
“You okay?”
Once again, he was stuck between not wanting to lie to Mike and not wanting to tell the truth. He sidestepped. “You should probably go home. It’s late.”
“No.”
Will straightened his head to look at Mike. “No?”
Mike shook his head, stepping forward again. “No.”
“Mike, you have to…” Will started, but he wasn’t actually sure what Mike had to do. They were in uncharted waters.
“I’m not-” Mike said, then cut himself off with a frustrated grown and stomp of his foot. “God, Will, I just- I hate that this is so hard but I’m just tired. I’m so tired of putting this away and pretending it doesn’t exist. I’m tired of spinning in circles trying to figure out how you feel, or how I feel. I want to just… say it. Do it. I don’t know.”
Will felt lightheaded. “Do what?”
Mike leaned forward slightly, allowing his face to be illuminated by the dim light from a few apartment windows. His eyes met Will’s and held steady. “Something I can’t do out here.”
Will’s foot slipped against the pavement, and he had to scramble to stay upright. He shoved himself off the wall, found himself too close to Mike’s face, turned away, then forced a deep breath. Holy shit. Holy fucking shit.
“Okay,” he managed.
“Okay?” Mike said from behind him. Every hair on his body stood at attention. He suppressed a shiver.
“Come on.” Then he grabbed Mike’s wrist and dragged him into his building, up the stairs, and all the way into his bedroom. He didn’t let himself think about it, didn’t allow a moment of hesitation.
Once in his room, he kicked off his shoes and locked the door behind them. He turned to face Mike. Mike turned to face him. The only light was the warm bulb in his desk lamp, illuminating them from the side and highlighting Mike’s perfect cheekbones, the shine in his eyes. The only sound was their light panting from how fast Will had gone up the four floors to his unit.
They stared at each other for a second. Then another. A third.
They stepped forward in the same moment, hands finding faces and fingers sinking into hair before finally, finally, their lips met.
An orchestra of fireworks exploded in Will’s chest, a choir of angels singing to the tune of Mike Wheeler.
Mike’s mouth was gentle, but his hands were hungry, pushing Will back against the door. Will wrapped his arms firmly around Mike’s shoulders, both to pull him down and keep himself upright. Each point of contact was a flashpoint, an electric surge, a burst of light.
The entire moment was a rollercoaster unlike anything he’d ever been on. His head spun. His stomach flipped.
He opened his mouth into the kiss. He didn’t know what he was doing. He was running on impulse alone.
When he broke away for air, Mike’s lips found their way to his neck, making him sigh like a nervous teenager as his hands slipped down Mike’s arms. His jacket was shoved off his shoulders and onto the floor. His hands found Mike’s vest, gripping it tight and using it to yank Mike back up to his mouth.
This was a dream. A beautiful, impossible dream. He’d had too much to drink and passed out and everything after was a figment of his imagination.
“Will,” Mike groaned quietly, and that was just too fucking much. Will shoved him away and tried to escape. His plan was complicated by the fact that he physically could not let go of Mike’s vest.
The result was that he manhandled Mike into collapsing on top of him. In his bed. Right.
Mike giggled into his neck, then kissed his jaw. Will quickly turned his head to recapture his mouth against his own. Another pop of electricity. He dug one hand into his hair, his gorgeous soft curls. Mike swiped a thumb across his cheek. Pulled him closer.
Will started to cry.
Mike noticed almost immediately, pulling back to hover above him with a look of such concern that Will started crying harder, laughing uncontrollably and throwing his arms over his face.
“Will,” Mike said softly, tugging at his arm. “Will, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong!” Will warbled, then remembered that Max and his sister were asleep on the other side of the wall. He lowered his voice to a murmur. “Nothing’s wrong, Mike, I’m just… I’m happy.”
This was the kind of scenario he used to hate himself for wanting.
Mike blinked at him with those big dumb eyes that he loved so much. His face was flushed crimson, his lips shiny and wet. So gorgeous it hurt. “Oh.”
Will exhaled deeply, wiping his eyes and dropping his arms onto the pillows above his head. He heaved in air, catching his breath after the tidal wave of emotions he didn’t even know existed.
The glittery edges of his Dr. Frank-n-Furter corset – still on under his shirt – scratched at his skin. He locked eyes with Mike, trying for a smirk.
“This tank top is pretty uncomfortable.”
Mike’s brows furrowed. “What-”
If it was possible for him to turn any redder, he did.
“Oh,” he repeated, slightly higher pitched this time. Will broke eye contact, unable to hold his resolve. He’d never gotten this far with anyone before, let alone the boy he loved most in the world.
To his dismay, Mike backed up off of him, giving him the space to sit up. “You can, uh, change if you need to. I’ll just…” He glanced around the room, looking for somewhere to hide. Will frowned at him.
“Mike, no, you’re supposed to-” He cut himself off with an embarrassed huff, sitting up and pulling his T-shirt off over his head. Then he grabbed Mike by the wrist and yanked him back down, placing his hand over the bow keeping the lace front together. “You’re supposed to help.”
Mike made a noise somewhere between squeaking and clearing his throat. “Right.”
Slowly, painfully slowly, he pulled at the bow until it came undone. His eyes kept darting between Will’s face and chest, wide and panicked and hungry all at once. Then he helped Will loosen the top and slip it off over his head.
That’s when Will realized that he’d flirted himself into shirtlessness without getting Mike to remove a single layer. Greedy bastard. He tugged at his vest.
“Off.”
Mike complied remarkably easily, tossing the vest onto the floor and even untucking his own shirt from his jeans without Will having to ask. Will grabbed him by the collar and yanked him into another kiss. He snaked his hands up Mike’s shirt, suppressing a giddy giggle when Mike’s hands found his bare waist.
The exploration was tentative, gentle, fragile without risk of shattering. Will had never felt so nervous or so sure, like he was suspended a thousand feet up in the air but flying instead of falling.
It took what felt like hours for the adrenaline rush to give way to a comfortable exhaustion. He tipped Mike over to be lying next to him, then rested his head comfortably on his chest. Mike’s hand found its way into his hair, combing lightly.
“Stay?” he murmured.
“Yeah,” Mike breathed, resting his cheek against the top of Will’s head.
Will fleetingly thought to get up and change into pajamas, or even get under the covers, but the rhythm of Mike’s gentle breathing lulled him to sleep faster than he could work up the willpower.
He woke to the sound of knocking on his door. He squinted blearily into a new day, disoriented. The desk lamp was still on, and sunlight streamed through the crack in his curtains.
“Will, you in there?” Max called through the door. She knocked again. “We didn’t hear you come home last night and want to make sure you’re not dead.”
“Not dead!” Will croaked. Sometime in the night he had rolled over, so now Mike was pressed against his back with one gangly arm draped over his waist. He was still solidly asleep, his breathing heavy and slow, punctuated by a few snores. Will’s heart fluttered.
“Oh, good,” Max sighed. Her footsteps retreated down the hall as she said something to El about his survival.
“Mike,” he whispered, craning his neck to try to get a better look at the boy currently poking him with his cold nose. The rest of Mike was warm, comfortably warm. He didn’t stir. “Mike,” he repeated, turning over slowly.
“Shhhhhh,” Mike grumbled, pulling Will close and ducking his head against his bare chest. Will stifled a laugh.
“Mike, we have to get up. It’s almost-” He checked the clock on his bedside table. “One in the afternoon? Oh my god.” They must’ve been up later than he’d realized.
Mike shook his head wordlessly, ever the contrarian.
“Michael,” Will huffed. Mike finally looked up at him. The faint outline of a crumpled pillowcase was etched into one of his cheeks, his hair was a ruffled mess, and his eyes were shiny with sleep. His brows were furrowed and his nose scrunched.
Will had never been more in love.
“William.”
“Hi,” he breathed.
“I can’t believe you made me sleep in jeans.”
Will snorted. “I didn’t make you do anything!”
“Well, you could,” Mike said, like it was nothing. Then he reached up and pressed his hand over Will’s face. “Stop looking at me like that.”
Will guffawed into Mike’s hand, attempting to shake him off to little avail. “Like what?”
“I don’t know,” Mike admitted. “It’s just making it hard to think.”
“What do you even have to think about?” Will tried to tamp down the giddiness bubbling from his stomach to his chest, the light fluttering joy threatening to spill out of his eyes at any moment. How was this actually happening?
Mike’s hand slid from his face to the side of his neck, holding him gently. “Not much, I guess.”
“That’s okay,” Will assured, patting his cheek. “You’re pretty enough to get by.”
He didn’t think much of the compliment, but it made Mike’s eyes widen. An old anxiety reared its head.
“Too far?”
The surprise on Mike’s face morphed to confusion, a bit of disbelief. “We made out for a few hours straight last night and you’re worried that you can’t call me pretty?”
It would be a miracle if Will’s face didn’t turn bright tomato red that second Mike said ‘we made out.’ He broke eye contact and shrugged self-consciously. “You never know.”
The only other person Will had kissed – the drunk basketball player – would’ve never let Will say something like that.
“I’m not afraid of this,” Mike said quietly, ducking to get Will to meet his eyes. “Well, maybe I am. A little. Or a lot. But I’m not afraid of you.”
That basketball player also would’ve never spent the night, or watched Rocky Horror, or been nice to his lesbian best friend. Maybe he should give Mike a little more credit.
“You can call me whatever you want.”
Will raised a brow. “Whatever I want?”
“Well, preferably nothing mean,” Mike hedged. “Preferably ‘pretty’, to be honest. ‘Handsome’ could work. But I can always accept a straightforward ‘good-looking.’”
“How about ‘bastion of modesty’?”
“I think ‘humility’ suits me better.”
“I might need to start taking notes.”
“You totally should,” Mike exhaled, right before he pulled Will into a kiss.
It was gentle and slow, and Will broke it off far earlier than he wanted to.
“El and Max are going to start wondering what’s wrong with me,” he murmured.
“Let them wonder!” Mike declared in a whisper, grabbing Will’s waist and yanking him on top of him. Will suppressed a surprised shriek.
“Shhh!” he hissed, unable to stop a grin. “What are you gonna do? Jump out a window?”
“Live here forever, actually.”
“Right, of course.”
“I see no flaw in my plan.” Mike pulled him down, angling for another kiss. Will turned his head, enjoying playing hard to get for a second.
“No, really, how are you gonna get out?”
Mike grumbled at him, poking his cheek. “Will.”
“If they’re in the living room, they’ll see you sneaking out the front door.”
“Will.”
“But maybe they’re in the kitchen making lunch or something? We could try.”
“Will!”
Will startled at Mike’s volume, finally turning his head to shush him only for Mike to cut him off with a quick kiss. He swallowed another burst of giggles. Oh, wow.
“I don’t care.”
“What?”
“I don’t care,” Mike repeated. “If they know I’m here.”
Will blinked up at him, not sure he understood. “Really?”
Mike shrugged, a little bit of sheepishness seeping through. “It’s Max and El. They’re gonna find out eventually.”
“They are?”
Mike huffed at him, his cheeks flushing a slight pink. “Yeah, well- they’re close friends of ours and El’s your sister, for fuck’s sake, so… since we’re, like, you know, now… they’re gonna find out eventually.”
“Since we’re, like, you know, now,” Will repeated flatly. He was immensely proud at how little his voice betrayed his hesitant excitement.
“You know,” Mike said again.
“I don’t think I do, Mike.”
“This is being mean, Will.”
“This is genuine confusion!”
Mike groaned at him, pushing his head into the pillows behind him. He glared at the ceiling for a second. Will waited. He wanted Mike to say it, not him.
“I’m just trying to say,” Mike started eventually, eyes still trained above Will’s head, “that this is not a one-time thing. I hope.”
That was close enough for Will.
“A relationship,” he suggested, grinning uncontrollably. Mike finally looked at him again, eyes wide.
“Yeah. Yeah, that.”
Jackpot.
“You want to walk into my kitchen and tell El and Max that we’re in a relationship?”
Mike didn’t say anything for a moment, taking in that actual possibility. “Okay, well-”
Will couldn’t help but laugh. No doubt, Mike had thought that dramatic reveal through and realized that coming out wasn’t something he was quite ready for.
“They can find out eventually!” Mike shushed him frantically. “And it’s not because I’m embarrassed of you or anything, it’s just maybe- maybe it can be just us for like, a second. Before everyone else makes it all… their business, or whatever.”
“Mike, I get it,” Will assured. He liked the idea of keeping this magic little ball of warmth to themselves for just a little while longer, too. Give them time to get their feet underneath them. He could trust that it wouldn’t be forever. “So, are we back to you jumping out the window, or…?”
Mike glanced over at his bedroom window, then back to him. He put on his thinking face. Will loved his thinking face.
“What if I slept on your floor?” he said after a moment. Will frowned.
“Huh?”
“What if we got back so late that I couldn’t make it to my place and just had to crash on your floor? That’s what we tell them, at least.”
“Mike, that’s so suspicious.”
Mike shrugged, grinning sideways up at him. “Exactly. We all know it’s probably not true, but it’s also not explicit enough for anyone to start getting nosy and annoying about it.”
“Not overtly.”
“Which is good enough for me.”
Will shook his head affectionately. “Dork.”
When they finally managed to get out of bed, Will changed into a fresh outfit and tried to offer one to Mike. Mike made a face, drawing a line from his hips to Will’s waist to emphasize their height difference.
“Yeah, I don’t know if any of your pants are gonna fit.”
“You moved your hand up,” Will protested, batting him away. “At least take a shirt.”
“I can just wear my-”
Will grabbed a shirt from his dresser and tossed it at Mike’s face. “Just take it, Wheeler.”
Mike laughed and caught the shirt before it dropped to the floor. “Alright, alright!”
The shirt Will had grabbed was an old yellow and white Atari tee, a little loose on him but perfectly fitted on Mike. He tried not to stare.
“Ready to face the music?”
Mike looked at him for a contemplative second, then grabbed him by the hips and yanked him in for a kiss that made his knees wobble. He broke away with a shit-eating grin. “Now I am.”
Will composed himself with difficulty, punching Mike lightly on the shoulder and willing his cheeks to cool down. Then he took a deep breath and led the way out into the hall.
Max and El were sharing a bag of chips on the couch, each taking notes from a respective textbook. El saw them first.
“Hello,” she said, a smile spreading across her face even as her brows furrowed in hesitant question.
“Is that the sleepyhead?” Max said, twisting around to face them. Her eyes widened. “Michael?”
“Hey,” Mike said with a little wave, stopping beside Will at the border between the living room and the hallway.
“We got back really late last night,” Will started to explain.
“And a little drunk,” Mike lied. “I slept on his floor.”
The girls gave each other a glance, and Will could almost hear them trying to get a collective read on the situation. Mike elbowed him not-inconspicuously, waggling his eyebrows. Will batted him away, trying to keep his poker face. He couldn’t let himself just start giggling at everything Mike did – he had to keep his pride intact and Mike’s ego in check.
“Okay,” Max said after a moment.
“Did you have fun at the movie?” El asked.
“Yeah, we did,” Will answered, looking to Mike.
“It was a great time,” Mike agreed. “I should probably get some homework done, now, though.”
Will sighed. “Me too. I have a painting to start.”
The last thing he felt like doing was leaving Mike’s company. That gave him an idea.
“Do you want to come work in the studio with me? There’s probably an extra table not completely covered in art supplies.”
Mike smiled. “Sure.”
They made a graceful, if not a little rushed, exit from the apartment after grabbing some food from their spare fridge, and headed to Mike’s apartment to grab whatever he needed to get work done. They decided it was best to let Mike go up alone, telling the same half-lie to Dustin and Lucas.
Inviting Mike to the basement art studios that Will and the other art majors were given to work on their assignments had seemed like such a good idea until he actually had to focus. The assignment was not to paint Mike Wheeler. But looking at him worry his bottom lip between his fingernails as he annotated a play made Will want to do nothing else.
He spent far too much time zoned out staring at Mike, replaying scenes from last night in his mind and flip-flopping wildly between I can’t believe this is real and this is absolutely not real. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d hallucinated something. Maybe the traumas of his youth were back to haunt him, and he owed Dr. Owens another call.
“Will.”
He blinked back into the studio, which had emptied of any other students while he hadn’t been paying attention. Mike was looking at him with a concerned tilt in his brow.
“Have you painted a single thing?”
“I have!” Will protested, gesturing to the vague splotches of color and shape on his canvas. “You have to trust the process.”
“If there’s one thing I trust, it’s your ability to make good art,” Mike said. “I just keep seeing you staring at nothing it’s kinda freaking me out.”
“Just trying to make you nostalgic,” Will joked.
Mike’s frown deepened. “For the days when you’d have PTSD flashbacks in the middle of math class?”
Will shrugged self-consciously. “When you put it like that…”
Mike set his book aside and gestured for Will to leave the easel and come sit by him. “Talk to me, Will.”
A gentle silence enveloped them for a moment as Will sat down and sorted out what he could even say. He couldn’t brush it off, couldn’t lie and say nothing was wrong. But nothing really was wrong, it was just that he’d spent so long teaching himself not to want this that he didn’t know how to act now that he had it.
“The way I feel about you, Mike,” he started carefully, “it didn’t just start last night. Or last week, or even last year. I don’t know if I could even tell you when it started. Maybe the day I met you.”
Mike’s mouth twitched up into a little smile, but he stayed quiet, waiting for Will to continue.
“I just know that eventually I realized that I… shouldn’t. That it wasn’t how I was supposed to feel, you know? But it just wouldn’t go away, even when you and El found each other and started to do all the right things and I knew that I should be doing the same but I was just so sure that-”
He paused to take a deep breath, trying not to cry.
“That my life was a lost cause already, so what was the point in trying to move on?”
A shudder passed through him, the aching phantom of that crushing loneliness. Mike reached out to grab his hand where it gripped his own thigh, squeezing comfortingly. He was not alone.
“Things got better in high school, with Robin and everyone. I’m not trying to say my life is this total tragic mess all the way through.” He sniffled. “I’m just trying to tell you that this means a lot to me. And it’s really fucking surreal, too.”
Mike laughed weakly, and to Will’s surprise his eyes were shiny with tears of their own.
“Are you okay?” he asked without thinking. That made Mike laugh even more.
“Oh my god, Will.”
“What?”
“I’m okay,” Mike said, his voice straining. He leaned forward and pressed his forehead into Will’s shoulder, hiding his face. He didn’t move. His hand still grasped Will’s against his leg.
Glancing sideways at the doors to the studio, Will let himself rest his head on top of Mike’s.
“This means a lot to me too.” Mike’s voice was quiet against his chest. He lifted his head again, revealing splotches of tears staining his freckled cheeks.
“I’ve been a tangled-up mess for my entire life, and I’ve always felt like you were the only one who could unravel whatever… feelings get stuck in here.” He gestured a hand over his heart, his expression pained.
“That used to scare the hell out of me, Will. It got to a point where even being near you would give me this overwhelming sense of dread – like I was about to be found out. I didn’t know what there was to find out, though. I didn’t until you left.”
I’m sorry, Will wanted to say, but didn’t. That wasn’t what Mike was looking for. It wasn’t Will’s fault that he’d been afraid, just like it hadn’t been Mike’s fault that Will used to hate himself.
He focused on what Mike was really saying, and not just what his stupid brain was telling him – like Robin had suggested during that phone call that felt like a century ago.
This wasn’t fleeting. This wasn’t an experiment. This wasn’t a sudden onset of confusion and impulses. This really was the relationship they’d agreed on that morning. It really was everything he had ever wanted.
“I love you.”
Will froze. He had just thought those exact three words, but he certainly hadn’t worked up the courage to say them. And he hadn’t.
Mike had.
Mike, who was looking at him a little bit like a rabbit caught in a wire trap, vulnerable and wide-eyed.
If it weren’t for the unlocked doors that any random student could burst through at a moment’s notice, Will would’ve grabbed both sides of his tragically gorgeous face and kissed him until he couldn’t breathe.
“I love you,” he said instead, voice barely above a whisper. In fact, his voice cracked with the effort to not sob.
Mike wheezed like someone had just punched him in the stomach. “Really?”
“You,” Will said, “are the most brilliant, beautiful, intelligent idiot I have ever met.”
“Okay, but, you’re serious?” Mike insisted. Will wanted to kiss him so badly.
“How are you struggling with this?”
“I’m notoriously difficult to be around!” Mike spluttered, throwing his hands up. Will quickly reached over to meet one of his palms with his own, lacing their fingers together and hiding them under the table.
“Mike Wheeler,” he said, forcing a deep breath to keep calm in the face of the most insulting thing he had ever heard. “You are my favorite person to be around.”
“I’ve hurt you.”
Will couldn’t believe how hard Mike was fighting this.
“We were kids, Mike. Scared, stupid kids. Barely older than we were when you saved my life - remember that?”
“That was one time.”
“Mike.” Will was about to lose his mind. “I love you. I am not going to stop loving you just because you have some weird aversion to it.”
“I don’t-”
“You are creative, and smart, and attentive, and kind, and such a nerd that it physically pains me to think about sometimes. You want to write a graphic novel with me, for fuck’s sake! How could I not be in love with you?”
He finished his rant with a heavy exhale, raising his eyebrows at Mike and daring him to try to refute it. He would go on forever if he had to.
Mike, for his part, stared at him for a moment of stunned silence, his brows pinching up like his emotions were about to overflow.
Then, finally, he said: “Cool.”
“Cool?” Will echoed incredulously. He couldn’t help but laugh.
Mike gestured helplessly towards his chest again. “I am unraveling at an insanely high rate.”
Will truly was so incredibly, deeply in love with this man.
“Can we please go somewhere else?” he pleaded. “Like, somewhere with a door that locks?”
Mike stood up so fast his chair toppled over. “Yes.”
Will broke into a grin, standing and moving to quickly collect his things. Mike took his backpack and hooked it over his shoulder the second he zipped it up.
“Oh, Mike-”
“I got it,” Mike insisted, heading towards the exit. “Let’s go.”
Will’s giddiness burst out in a laugh as he tried to catch up to Mike’s speed-walk. “Where are we even going?”
“It’s almost five,” Mike said, glancing at his watch. “Dustin’s gonna be calling his girlfriend at the phone booth across the street and Lucas will be at his EMT training. Also-”
He stopped short, turning to catch Will before he fully rammed into him. Will was breathless already, not even a little bit from the walking. Mike met his eyes steadily.
“I really do love you.”
There had never been a longer walk in Will’s life.
--
Mike was so incredibly ready to spend the rest of life doing whatever Will Byers wanted him to. Kiss him, hold him, carry his stuff, watch him work, walk him home, wake up next to him, build him a house. Kill a person. He had never understood the appeal of knighthood more.
He had also never felt more like Mike the Brave. That DnD persona he’d built in far simpler days, before he’d had much to really be brave about. Now he had to be brave, because being brave had got him Will, and he was not going to give him up. Not for anything.
He’d meant it when he’d said he was unravelling. Will had grabbed the thread holding him together and pulled. He was completely undone in his hands.
At the same time, he had never felt more solid.
Love was a very strange thing, as it turned out.
“Mike,” Will murmured into his mouth. That alone hit him like four shots of caffeine-infused vodka injected directly into his veins. Every single inch of him was alive and electric and desperate for Will, Will, Will.
He trailed his nails gently down the side of Will’s torso, under his shirt, soaking in the way it made him inhale shakily and tilt his head back. He hovered above him, meeting every sigh with a kiss.
“Mike,” Will repeated. Mike groaned involuntarily this time, burying his face between Will’s neck and shoulder. Will’s fingers combed through his hair. He shivered at the gentle touch.
“Will, I swear,” he started weakly.
Will laughed, sweet and pure and full of mischief. “Won’t Dustin and Lucas be back soon?”
“Why do you always have to bring reality into it?” Mike whined.
“Sorry,” Will said, sounding genuinely apologetic. Mike pushed himself up to frown at him.
“I was joking.”
Will smiled up at him. “Okay.”
He was so handsome, his hair ruffled and his eyes soft and his lips freshly kissed.
“I’ll walk you home,” Mike said after a moment, because if he couldn’t avoid their separation, he could at least delay it.
The second he moved to get off the bed, however, Will grabbed his shirt collar and yanked him back down. He collapsed on top of him with a tiny oof and laughed.
“I take it back, let’s stay here forever,” said Will.
Mike grinned into Will’s chest. “Fine by me.”
A moment of comfortable silence. Mike breathed in the smell of Will’s laundry detergent and sweat, trying to memorize it.
“Do you think they’ll be okay with it?” Will asked.
“Our friends?”
“Yeah. I never really came out to Max or Lucas. And you’d know more about Dustin than me.”
Mike had never come out to anybody ever. He tried to imagine what Dustin would say. Tried to imagine him turning away in disgust or saying something cruel.
He couldn’t picture it. Dustin was one of the best friends he’d ever had. They’d bonded over their distaste for popularity and love for DnD. Dustin had never judged Eddie for his jewelry and theatrics – he’d actually loved him for it.
“Dustin’s gonna be okay with it,” Mike decided. “Max and Lucas, too.”
He had met Lucas in his first ever college class, a freshman seminar about medieval history. They’d sat next to each other, struck up a conversation, and clicked almost instantly. His friendship with Max had been a bit of slower build, but she and Lucas were undeniably a package deal.
Thinking back on it now, he and Max probably sensed how similar they were from a single conversation and tried to avoid someone that argumentative.
Either way, Max and Lucas were noble people. They stuck up for others. They were anything but small-minded or cruel. Will probably knew that more than Mike did, given that he’d known them four years longer.
“I believe you,” Will said quietly.
“It can still be just between us for a while, though,” Mike assured. Just because he thought his friends would accept him didn’t mean he was ready to march in the pride parade.
Will kissed the top of his head. “We’ll take it slow.”
That plan lasted a single week.
Their friends had decided to get together and go to some house party Dustin’s robotics team was throwing. Drinks were flowing freely, and each drop of alcohol introduced to Mike’s system brought him closer to the point of no return in regard to Will. Which is to say he wanted him. Badly.
The two of them had spent the week meeting up in whatever free blocks of time they had, browsing at Dark Carnival or just wandering around campus talking. But there hadn’t been many opportunities for complete privacy.
Mike was feeling a little pent up, to say the least.
It didn’t help that Will kept touching him. A brush of the hand here, a bump of the shoulder, even letting his entire body get pressed against Mike’s when the crowd was tight enough to excuse it. He’d look up at him and smile bashfully and sway drunkenly, saying something Mike could barely hear over the music and the rush of blood in his ears.
In response, Mike leaned in a little further than he maybe should’ve, wetted his lips a little too often, and hardly ever took his eyes off Will. Even when he wasn’t talking to Mike, like when he let El rock him back and forth on the dance floor or laughed at Dustin and Lucas headbanging to the music.
“Mike?” Will called at some point in the night, spinning around aimlessly. Mike pushed his way through the crowd without a thought. Will grinned at him, affection so blatant on his face that Mike almost tripped over his own feet. “Mike!”
“Hey.” His hands had a mind of their own, reaching right for Will’s face. He redirected at the last second and rested them on the wall behind Will’s head, then realized that, too, was suspicious. He turned and slumped against the wall instead. Will laughed at him.
“Shut up,” he whispered, embarrassed. “There are too many people here.”
“Too many people,” Will echoed. Then he hiccupped, falling back against the wall beside Mike. “Gotta keep my hands to myself.”
Mike turned to look at him, heart fluttering. “Yeah?”
Will lolled his head sideways, that lazy affectionate grin still stuck on. The colorful lights lit his face like a film star, or maybe that was just Mike’s imagination. “Yeah.”
He leaned in closer, hooking a finger into Mike’s shirt collar and pulling him in. Mike stopped breathing. Their faces were so close he could smell the spiced rum on Will’s breath.
“I wanna be all over you.”
Then Will pushed him back into the wall headed back into the crowd, leaving Mike to stumble after him like a lost puppy. He could feel his blood pumping. Holy shit.
Will led him right back to their group of friends, starting some conversation Mike did not have the current mental aptitude to pay attention to. All he could hear was Will’s voice. All he could think about was Will. All over him.
“Mike, come on, we’re going.”
He nodded along breathlessly, staying close at Will’s heels. It helped that Will would occasionally hook a finger through his belt loop to pull him this way or that. It honestly made him want to go off course just so Will would yank him back.
He stayed quiet the entire walk back to his apartment, worried he would express any number of thoughts like that aloud. He gathered that they were all going back to his place to order pizza and play video games. By that point, Will had jolted him around enough that he was liable to explode.
The second they stepped through the front door, he loudly announced that he had to pee. Everyone turned to stare at him, confused. Including Will.
“I meant barf,” he corrected, grabbing Will’s hand and dragging him towards the bathroom. “Will is going to make sure I’m okay.”
“Do you want some water?” El asked.
“No thanks!”
Then he slammed the bathroom door shut behind them. Will giggled, opening his mouth to say something. Mike swooped down to press their lips together before he could.
Fucking finally.
“We could’ve-” Will started in the second Mike pulled away to breath before diving back in. “We could’ve gone to your room!”
“Suspicious,” Mike excused, nipping at his bottom lip. Will hummed a laugh against his mouth and the vibrations shook his entire body.
“Right, and what you just did was not.” Will’s arms wound their comfortable way around Mike’s shoulders, pulling him back towards the wall and sighing into his open mouth.
Mike ignored the shady comment and breathed in his share of Will, hugging him impossibly closer and raking his fingers through his fluffy hair. Tracing his thumb over the little moles on his face. Most beautiful man in the world.
The door opened behind them. “Mike, where’s the-”
Dustin’s eyes blew wide as Mike whipped around, accidentally crushing Will against the wall in an effort to hide him from view. Will shrieked in surprise.
“Get out!” Mike yelled, darting forward to shove Dustin back and slam the door closed.
There was a deafening silence throughout the entire apartment.
“I told you not to go in there,” Lucas said from somewhere in the living room.
Then Will started to laugh.
He was quiet at first, muffled into his own hand, but it didn’t take long for the snickers to turn to full-body-shaking laughs. He slumped against the bathroom wall and slid down to the floor as Mike just watched, struck dumb.
“Oh my god,” Will panted through a laugh, looking up at Mike to reveal genuine tears in his eyes. His cheeks were flushed red, from alcohol or kissing or embarrassment. All three, probably. “Dustin!”
“Yeah,” Mike said, surprising himself with his own laugh. “Dustin.”
Will tucked his knees to his chest and dropped his head forward, still snorting every so often. “We should- oh my god, we’re exposed.”
“Will,” Mike managed, sinking down and placing his hands on Will’s knees. “Are you okay?”
“Yes!” Will said, lifting his head with a blinding grin. Mike surged forward to kiss him without a thought, too overwhelmed by the crinkle of his eyes and the shiny tears on his beautiful lashes. Will giggled. “Hi.”
“Hi,” Mike responded. There was a glowing ball of light in his chest where all that confused dread used to be. “I love you.”
Will started crying in earnest. “I love you!”
“You’re so drunk,” Mike laughed.
“You too.” Will stuck a finger to his forehead, then traced it lazily down his nose before dropping onto his lips. He kept going until his finger hooked into Mike’s shirt collar. “I think we have to tell them now.”
“Probably.”
“I also think,” Will said, giving him a look that made that glowing ball of light seep into every cell in Mike’s body, “that we’re gonna be okay.”
It had been a very long time since Mike Wheeler had felt at all sure about his future. Before Will had gone missing, maybe. When they ran around the woods in their muddy costumes, swinging sticks and pretending they were swords and wands. Back when Will Byers made him believe that magic was real.
Nothing felt safe after he realized that Will could be taken away just as quickly as he’d appeared.
But they weren’t in Hawkins anymore. They were in Mike’s apartment in Berkeley, California, where he lived with two of the truest friends he’d ever known, laugh-crying on the floor of his bathroom because they’d been caught kissing. And he felt safe. And he felt certain.
His future would have Will in it. His future was something to look forward to.
“Yeah,” he agreed. “We’re gonna be okay.”