Chapter Text
Verin watches his brother walk across the ballroom as though the weight of being here and the heft of the pain he is carrying isn’t affecting him at all. But Verin remembers how excruciating it used to be, and Essek’s medication has helped in some ways since, so this must be even more horrifyingly painful after a period of less pain. Verin sighs, draining his drink. Essek is literally surrounded by people who care about him, who love him and he won’t tell them what he’s dealing with, daily. Verin understands his reasons but he can tell that these Empire friends and fiances of his are very different to his past experiences.
“That was a big sigh, are you okay?” Jester asks.
Verin shakes his head. He has reached his limit, he’s watched Essek suffer since yesterday, more tonight than at any other time, and he’s had enough. His brother needs help, and has a wonderful group with him that Verin has quickly become sure will want to help him. In fact, they’ve probably been willing to help him for months. Verin will take his brother’s anger, the Umavi has been steadily looking more furious all evening under her razor-sharp politeness. Essek is going to need all the help he can get.
He nods towards the door, “Come on.”
He takes Liriel’s hand, his light nods at his expression. He doesn’t try to stop Verin, he’s told Verin his worries too.
“All of us?” checks Jester.
“Definitely.”
The ball has reached its quiet last hour or so. So no one seems surprised when Verin walks out of the ballroom, Essek’s friends close behind him. Verin takes them to the library that they spent the previous evening in.
He notes to a passing servant who is definitely going to report everything to the Umavi, “If the Umavi needs me, I’m explaining our wedding customs to Essek’s visitors. We don’t wish to be disturbed.”
The servant bows and heads away, as Verin leads the group into the library and makes sure the door is closed before he sags onto the nearest couch. Liriel sits with him, his arm around Verin immediately, warm and supportive. Thank the Light for his husband.
Verin takes a deep breath and murmurs to Liriel, “He’s in so much pain.”
Liriel nods and Beau cocks her head as she sits down too, “Who’s in pain?”
Verin waits until the whole group is sitting and then thinks silently, I’m sorry, brother. You need their help and it’s going to get worse after tonight, and I can’t be there for you in Rexxentrum.
Then he says, “Essek, he’s been in pain since we were boys, because of the Umavi. He doesn’t want me to tell you this, he doesn’t want anyone in his new life to know. I understand why, but he…you all clearly care for him.”
“Yes, we love Essek,” insists Jester immediately, looking troubled. “He’s in pain? A lot of it? Why/”
“When you say pain, do you mean the pain of the Umavi’s disapproval or something physical?” asks Fjord, looking concerned.
Verin looks at Caleb and Molly, who are sitting together, their hands intertwined. Both of them are frowning and Caleb looks very tense. Yes, Verin is sure this will hurt them the most. He hopes they can forgive Essek’s deception, he knows from what Essek’s told him that Caleb and Molly both have been through a lot of difficulty with their own families, different kinds but he thinks there should be understanding there. And he’s seen firsthand now their love for him, it’s obvious every time they look at him. Light, he hopes he’s not wrong.
Liriel squeezes his hand, and he starts, “So, you know that Essek started questioning how much he wasn’t allowed to question the limits of scientific knowledge and research here. The answers he got always came back to the Luxon but he couldn’t take anything on faith, he needed to know. It’s why he’s so good at his work.”
He sees Caleb’s faint proud smile and smiles back, “I didn’t understand all of that until I was older but what I always knew was that how the Umavi punished Essek for questioning the Luxon was wrong, because it hurt him. She hurt him.”
He hears Jester’s sharper intake of breath and nods, taking a moment to let the memories of Essek in agony, from too young an age, stop dominating his thoughts. His voice cracks when he speaks again though, “Even before he declared that a god that doesn’t invite questions and exploration when that could deepen faith is a poor one, or that the people who were gatekeeping were just as bad, she hurt him. She kept me away from it all. He was forced into holding his body in single positions for hours, I think she used belts and straps to keep him in place.”
“You didn’t see any of it though?” checks Beau, her voice low.
“She told me all about it, she wanted me to know that those who insult the Luxon and don’t follow the Luxon in full faith need to be punished in order to humble themselves. The Luxon expect us to strive for perfection that will make our den proud and bring more blessings. Essek and I didn’t share a bedroom but I would sneak in to see him afterwards and he couldn’t move, he was in so much pain. It happened a lot. I think she used to hit him when he was strapped down too. He made me promise not to try to help him because then I’d get punished too.”
There’s tears in his voice now. Verin pauses and feels Liriel pull him closer, he can hear sniffs and pain in the silence. He notices how silently furious Veth looks, he remembers Essek’s stories about Veth and her son. He’s glad at least there’s a different kind of mother in Essek’s life now, even just as a friend. Verin hates that there’s more for him to tell them still.
“He wasn’t allowed any pain medication,” Verin continues. “Because the point was for him to be punished, the pain should remind him of what path he should be on and of what punishment a heretic should suffer. And he should rely totally on the Luxon to see him through it, to show his faith.”
“That’s some fundamentalist bullshit,” declares Beau, her eyes challenging Verin.
But Verin nods, “I agree. My faith is very different to hers, she didn’t realise how different until I joined Liriel’s den and didn’t try to change them, like she hoped I would. I think she assumed I’d get them to support Den Thelyss more than their own goals.”
“You said when we came in here that he’s in so much pain, you mean he still is now?” asks Fjord, still frowning, his arm around an upset Jester.
Verin nods, “The punishments stopped once he was old enough to be considered an adult. By then, his body was permanently changed. He has chronic pain in his joints and muscles. Even with the medication he takes now living in the Empire, it doesn’t take away all of the pain. And while he’s here this weekend, he left his medication at home, because he knew the Umavi would have his luggage searched and he says she would have found some way to get him or you thrown in jail for it so she could get him to stay in Rosohna. He’s right, she would have. She even,,,”
Here Verin breaks off for a moment because this still makes him feel so angry, “She made sure that the therapeutic bath salts that he used here were taken out of his room.”
Everyone looks shocked at that pettiness, though Molly’s eyes are more narrowed in anger. Beau shakes her head, “So bath salts are as bad as pain meds?”
“He deserves no relief from the pain he brought on himself, especially if he refuses to seek the Light for healing,” Verin recites the Umavi’s words back to them, from decades before. “He got really good at hiding them from her here but she’s had time to have every inch of his rooms searched.”
“So he’s been in pain the whole time we’ve known him?” exclaims Jester. “Why didn’t he tell us?”
“Ja, it would not have mattered to us,” states Caleb, his voice quiet and deeply sad. “Did he think we would not believe him? Or give him too much attention, try to touch him too much?”
Verin smiles sadly, “No one’s ever given him too much attention, so I don’t think he’d know. He’s hiding his pain from everyone, especially in front of the Umavi. She already wants to find a way to use him as a public example of what happens to a heretic and use it to show what a good Umavi she is, wanting a ‘broken heretic’ in her den to see him saved by the Luxon, that’s how strong her faith is. And she can get him engaged to someone who can help her elevate the den even more.”
“She doesn’t care about the pain he’s in,” murmurs Yasha, her hand in Beau’s. “Or that he doesn’t want to marry here.”
Verin nods in agreement, remembering what Essek has told him about Yasha’s past and the pain that she experienced defying her family in marrying who she loved. Of course she understands. He’s glad that Essek will have such empathetic support, even if the similar experience is so awful.
He turns his attention to Caleb again, “And as for why Essek didn’t tell you about his pain before this weekend, people he would have considered colleagues before, maybe friends, once they found out about his condition and its source, they drew back from him. No one wants to be close to an unrepentant heretic, or risk getting branded as one too. It happened constantly.”
“Essek thinks we’re those kind of assholes?” Beau asks, in angry disbelief, probably not just at Essek.
Verin stays calm, he understands her multiple targets all too well. He’s felt angry at himself, at the Umavi and at Essek all at the same time, for almost the same reason.
“He’s been badly treated by the majority of the people in his life for most of it,” he explains. “The people who weren’t treating him like someone to avoid and verbally abuse were acting like he was fragile and should be pitied, or that he needed to be persuaded to see sense. The Umavi made it clear from the time she started punishing him that he was a deep disappointment. He didn’t want you to think the same thing, or he thought you’d feel it was too much effort to be his friend.”
Verin can remember too many phone calls where Essek and he talked about something that had happened years before, and how every story included Essek being shamed or left out because of his physical condition, because of the choices he’d made and didn’t regret but was always abused for.
“We wouldn’t stop being his friend!” Jester protests, her eyes wet. “We won’t stop being his friend. We love him.”
“Yes, and he’s not the only one in our group who has, you know, moments where we need time and space or some extra consideration,” adds Fjord. “Essek knows that, he’s heard about my nightmares.”
“And about when fuckers want to blame me for everything my brother did, and my crashes afterwards,” Molly adds, casually.
“He’s seen my panic attacks,” says Caleb quietly, which gets him a kiss on the cheek from Molly, and Veth wrapping her arm around him as best she can, which he leans into.
“He has told me something about what you’ve all been through, so that I could understand why he was worrying or concerned about you when I called him,” Verin tells them. “I know I find it easier to focus on other people’s problems than my own. Essek and I both minimise our own pains, especially around the people we care about.”
He kisses Liriel’s hand at that point, which gets him a loving smile and his husband agreeing, “We’re still working on that.”
“Wait, his no-touching thing, is that because of the pain?” intuits Beau. “It’s not that he doesn’t like being touched? It’s because it hurts him?”
Verin smiles, impressed, “Essek told me how good you are at pulling information together. Yes, we’re not a…tactile den at all so touch is not something he’s used to anyway. I had an excellent teacher.”
He smiles at Liriel who shakes his head and laughs, “Me, and the army.”
“Yeah, that helped too. You get over any issues with touch during training. But Essek, when he isn’t using medication, any touch that isn’t gentle or careful makes his pain worse. So he tells people that he isn’t comfortable being touched instead.”
“Oh no, my hugs hurt him!” Jester sounds distraught.
Verin holds up a hand quickly, “He’s told me that your hugs are worth it, Jester. No one has ever wanted to hug him as much or as often as you do. It completely confused him when he first met you. You’re worth the pain.”
Tears stream down Jester’s face as her smile both brightens and wobbles. Yes, Verin knows that feeling well. Verin turns to Caleb and Molly now.
“You’re both worth the pain too,” he tells them intently, because he really wants them to know this. “Seeing him with you both has been the best part of this weekend. I didn’t know if he’d ever let himself get that close enough to anyone again, but I knew it had happened from how he talked about you, not that he admitted it until the engagement. And then when I saw how he looked at you, I knew then, it had actually happened. My brother has fallen in love and he is fully loved back.”
Verin sighs heavily and leans more into Liriel. The relief is so much more than he’s said, but he hopes they get it at some level. He’s worried so much that Essek wouldn’t open up again even to a possibility of love, but he has, to two people. Of course to two people, one who seems a lot like him and one who seems opposite. Verin likes that though, Caleb can sympathise with him and know him, and Molly can draw him out, and both can, and do, love him. Verin can’t help smiling broadly, his brother is in love and is loved.
Caleb is blushing but Molly is grinning and squeezing Caleb’s hand. Jester has dried her tears and looks incredibly happy.
“I told you it was obvious,” she proclaims.
“Wait, wait, did you say ‘again’? That Essek was in love before?” Veth demands to know.
“Ah,” Verin lets out a breath. “You didn’t hear this from me, okay? It’s the only time I’ve seen Essek start to fall in love. He needs to get to know someone before he becomes interested in them in any way, and he’d known Vanyr for years through school. When they reached our university level of learning, they’d study together and I could see how Essek felt about him, though he kept telling me they were only friends and that was all. But he must have let Vanyr know how he felt, accidentally or on purpose, because Vanyr apparently very kindly told him that he only saw Essek as a friend and he hoped they could stay friends.”
Here Verin’s eyes narrow as he remembers what happened next, “I heard from one of Vanyr’s sisters that when their den found out, Vanyr told them that he liked Essek’s mind but that everything else was of course too much to take on. I didn’t tell Essek but I’m pretty sure he heard about it, you know, it added to the whole narrative of the punishment he deserved for being a heretic. Vanyr didn’t stop talking to him but he was pretty embarrassed around Essek afterwards, like he’d encouraged Essek too much and he was sorry. Essek was pretty mortified.”
“And he looks at Caleb and Molly the same way he looked at Vanyr?” checks Fjord.
Verin nods with a smile, “Like that and more. The Umavi can see it too, that’s one of the reasons why she’s so furious. She knows this isn’t a plan to stop her reaching her goals, or him trying to get back at her, this is genuine. I mean, the way Essek dressed tonight alone…”
Liriel nods in agreement and Verin smiles at his husband, nudging his head closer to Liriel’s, “You did a great job with his hair.”
“Thank you, but that’s all I did. Everything else was him.”
“What is special about his dress?” asks Yasha.
“Essek told you that the way people dress in Rosohna has everyday meaning as well as cultural meaning? Everything we wear says something. Essek made sure that everything he wore this weekend was something he bought, right down to his jewellery and shoes. And the dress he’s wearing tonight, he rarely wore white before. The dress’s style is different to everyone else’s here too but he’s not breaking any cultural rules, he’s not dressing inappropriately. The necklaces are a great touch, they fill in his neckline so he’s not showing any skin but he’s not wearing a high neck like everyone else is. He’s following the rules but using his own style, not Rosohna’s and not the Umavi’s. And the earrings are telling the clearest story, everything is silver and mithrel apart from a ruby and an opal.”
He gestures to Molly and Caleb one after the other. Jester gasps, “I said that was for you! Mama says jewellery tells you everything.”
“It seems pretty conclusive now,” agrees Beau with a challenging eyebrow and a smug grin at her friends.
Molly nudges Caleb gently, “I agree, love. It says a lot, especially from our Essek.”
Verin smiles widely, so glad to hear that. The love Caleb and Molly have for Essek and for each other is blindingly obvious, but Verin isn’t surprised that they might find it challenging to read Essek as well as he does. Essek dedicates so much energy to hiding himself and his feelings, at least he can trust and let go a bit with these friends. Just hearing Essek talk about them all made Verin worry less about Essek, but seeing them with Essek has made him worry even less.
“I’m assuming you had to tell him how you felt at the start of all this,” he asks Caleb and Molly knowingly. “There’s no way that Essek said anything.”
“No, and we had to really push to get them there too,” declares Beau with another smug look at Caleb. “It took fucking forever.”
“He plays it all close and he doesn’t like being touched,” Molly points out. “Even I hesitated.”
“And you don’t hesitate when you’re interested in anything,” adds Jester.
Molly lifts his shoulders but his words aren’t casual, “Essek’s too precious to risk.”
Verin is touched to hear that Essek was so carefully considered before the relationship began. “And he deserves better than being displayed and used by the Umavi in her bid for Den Thelyss to become the ruling den.”
“Oh shit, she’s aiming that high?” exclaims Beau.
“She believes it is the Luxon’s will,” sighs Verin. “She’s willing to marry off Essek and I to get the right support, and there’s plenty of dens who’d like to get their hands on a heretic to transform him into a believer because of how much that would elevate their status and please the Luxon.”
“There’s no way Essek wants to follow their rules though,” frowns Jester.
Verin’s mouth is a tight line now, “They don’t care what he wants. They’d find a way to force the right words out of him, so they think.”
“Or they’d keep trying to shape him, no matter what it does to him,” explains Caleb, with a voice like he knows.
He does know and Verin only nods, “It’s why the Umavi didn’t try punishing him much as an adult. She wants there to be something left for his husband and his husband’s den.”
Molly snarls something in infernal and everyone in the room looks equally furious. Verin holds up his free hand, “I agree with you. I’m very blessed that unlike my brother, I am the type to fall in love at first sight and that I met my light far away from the Umavi. Essek is extremely blessed that the same thing happened to him.”
That lightens the room immediately and Verin turns to Caleb and Molly again, “Look, I know, it’s probably been a lot of long waiting with my brother to get any explanations or honest feelings out of him. But he spent most of his life here being punished for his honesty and for who he is, and people that he was almost close to wanted nothing to do with him anymore. He’s been taught that he is too much or too damaging, so he may never find being honest about himself easy.”
“That does explain a lot,” muses Veth to Jester who nods immediately.
Verin smiles at them briefly and warmly, saying, “And thank you for your patience too. And your persistence, I’ve heard a lot about that. Thank the Luxon you all were, because it has done a lot for him when I know he’s probably snapped at you all or been rude and you probably didn’t understand why-.”
“Yes, but we started to understand when he told us about your Umavi,” Fjord cuts in. “And we know even more now so we can be better friends. I just wish he'd been able to tell us sooner so we could have been better friends.”
“Especially when he knows about all our bullshit,” agrees Beau.
“I'm sure he doesn't know it all,” Verin points out, managing to keep his defensiveness of his brother gentle, feeling Liriel squeeze his hand in proud response. He knows Liriel understands, just like he knows he’s talking to probably the only people who care about Essek as much as he does and who want to help him just as much too “And that probably encouraged him to say something in the first place, to repay your honesty. But it goes against what he learned here, which is that revealing his truth would only get him hurt.”
“Not with us,” Caleb tells Verin, his gaze firm.
He is entirely serious and while Molly is smiling beside him, the same seriousness is present in his striking red eyes. Verin can’t help smiling back. He believes them, light, he’s so glad Essek met them, all of them. He smiles at them all and is about to thank them when there’s a quick knock at the door. He exchanges a look with Liriel and watches as his husband quickly stands to cross the room and open the door very slightly, then wider.
It’s Celar, and Verin’s eyes twitch at what he hears, his gaze widening. He doesn’t say anything until Liriel takes a tray from Celar and thanks him before closing the door again. His expression is very worried as he brings the tray over, it carries two full glasses of champagne, likely the cover for Celar coming to the room in the first place.
“Did he say-?”
“Yes,” Little nods rapidly as he sits, placing the tray on the coffee table. He turns to the others, his hand reaching for Verin’s. “Essek has been called to talk privately with the Umavi. Apparently a guest mentioned to her that they saw Essek’s fiances in a shocking moment of public intimacy tonight.”
Everyone turns to Caleb and Essek, with Beau exclaiming, “You couldn’t fucking keep it in your pants for one evening!? Seriously?”
“I like public sex as much as the next performer but I’ve kept everything in my pants tonight except for behind closed doors,” retorts Molly, leaning against Caleb some more who colours slightly but nods in agreement.
“Ah, shocking public intimacy here could be considered milder public affection in the Empire or on the coast,” Verin replies, remembering a few tours that had opened his eyes to that. “I had to learn that too.”
“And Essek told us that,” Fjord replies with a note in his voice that says he can’t believe they’re having this conversation for that very reason. “So, did you dance like you do at home? Or put your hands somewhere…intimate?”
“Ooh, name the intimate possibilities, Fjord,” teases Molly, grinning at Fjord’s increasingly dark green blush. “And no, we were private and careful with all our intimacies.”
“We were not always behind closed doors though,” frowns Caleb, tense again. “Earlier, that hallway between the dining room and the ballroom.”
“Fuck, no one was there though,” protests Molly though he does look a touch worried now. “It was a bit of kissing. I’d had two fuckers call me demonspawn not under their breath and three others talk about the fucking amazing strength of the Umavi and how they wished somewhere called the Prison of Penance was used for heretics.”
Caleb mutters in Zemnian and holds Molly close, adding quietly that he’d needed it too. Yasha reaches to hold Molly’s free hand, and Verin assures them all, “The Umavi has been furious all night, something was going to light this fuse. And the Prison of Penance is used strictly for political prisoners, though there’s been rumours for decades that heretics have been put there under false charges too.”
“Your Umavi would make that happen if she was part of the ruling den, wouldn’t she?” said Beau with grim surety.
“She’d try, if it wouldn’t affect trade with other countries,” replies Verin, trying not to focus on that particular horrifying part of the Umavi’s goals when they have to focus on another. “Okay, you two need to get to her office. Essek's held himself together this whole evening, and she's already made him lose his appetite.”
“How?” asks Caduceus with a slight frown. “I mean, the food was very nice, all very new to me, but very nice.”
“Yes, but it was also the exact meal that our father ate the night he died, after arguing with Essek.”
There’s an air of disbelief and shock that tells Verin the group weren’t told about this either.
“The Umavi has never forgiven him for it,” he adds.
“But you did?”
“Beau,” warns Fjord quietly.
“No, I did,” answers Verin, meeting Beau’s gaze. “Essek was trying to be heard or understood or engaged with. He wasn't trying to kill our father. Everything you’ve been served this weekend in this house is something that Essek can’t stand the taste of.”
“I thought she was trying to get him to stay,” asks Yasha, confused.
“She’s also punishing him for leaving in the first place, or for not returning,” explains Verin, getting to his feet. “It’s a taster of what will come if she somehow forces him to stay, so that he can be humbled and brought to the Light in whatever ways she decides on. And it will take force to make him stay, it took blackmail to get him here this weekend.”
“He said she was going to make your life hellish,” Jester puts in, her head cocked with interest.”Was she going to force you to stay too?”
“No, she can’t do that because she has no influence over the army. She told Essek she was going to make sure that any adoptions Liriel and I wanted wouldn’t go through. I’m sure she has a plan somehow to use our adoption for Den Thelyss. She got me here by threatening to get Essek engaged to someone he’d hate. But Essek and I have decided, we’re staying away from now on, no matter the threats.”
Liriel stands beside him, his hand strong in Verin’s. Fjord stands as well, Jester jumping up beside him, as he says, “Can we do anything?”
“You should probably pack to leave and change your clothes if that’ll make travel easier,” Verin replies. “If she’s not got a plan to have Essek forced to stay here tonight, she’ll have one to have you all thrown out.”
“She’s not going to try to have us arrested?” asks Beau, sounding disappointed.
“I think if she could have, she would have tried already, before the ball, so she could use the ball to start negotiations for Essek’s engagement” replies Verin. “So, good job on not breaking the law.”
“Thanks,” beams Jester. “I’m going to make a really great painting about this whole thing. I’ll send you photos.”
Verin can’t help smiling, he can see how Jester got close to Essek so quickly. She is relentless in her generosity and loyalty to her friends (she’s already offered to send him a painting of his own) and in her genuine desire to spend time with them. He’s seen it throughout the weekend.
“I would love that,” he replies. “Will it take you long to pack?”
“We’re way ahead of you,” boasts Veth. “Everything’s packed already, so we can leave early tomorrow. Or make a speedy getaway tonight.”
Some of Verin’s worry dissolves and he nods, “That’s wonderful. Okay, I would say, go to your rooms, change if you want to, and Caleb and Molly should wait for Essek. You’ll probably get to hear what the Umavi’s throwing at Essek, the walls aren’t soundproofed and people will be starting to leave very soon so she won’t care who overhears.”
“Tell us everything,” Veth tells Caleb.
“Yeah, everything,” Beau agrees.
“I think Essek will very much want to be alone after he has been shouted at by your Umavi though,” Caleb protests to Verin. “I don’t know what he was like here, but with us, Molly is right, he keeps things very close.”
Verin smiles sadly, he hates that Essek can’t open up to people who clearly love him so much and who want to help, with no intention of punishing him for it.
“Believe me, he is going to be furious with me for telling you all any of this,” he admits. “But the only person he’s ever talked to about the pain, all of it, is me and I know he hasn’t told me everything, because he’s always going to want to protect me, like he did when we were kids. My job was to get out and I really got out, I ran away to the army and got a new den with Liriel and I left him behind to deal with the Umavi alone. He doesn’t blame me but I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive myself for it.”
“He’s happy you’re happy,” Liriel reminds him. “And you’re giving that back to him now.”
Verin nods with a sigh, though the guilt stays where it is, and he looks at Caleb and Molly, “He’ll need you. Apart from me, he’s not had people who want to be there for him.”
“Wow, we don’t know anyone like that,” deadpans Beau, looking at Caleb pointedly.
“You’ve come a long way, love,” Molly tells Caleb, kissing his hand. “You had us to persist in being there for you when you tried suffering alone. Now we can do the same for him, you can show him how it’s done.”
Verin is relieved as they all nod in recognition and agreement. Essek really has found the best den for him. They all get up, talking through who will go in which car and where they can stay for the one night stopover towards home.
“Shall we check Essek’s room?” Liriel asks him. “I don’t know if he’s packed everything.”
“We can look, but he’ll need to check too. He shouldn’t leave anything behind that he brought with him,” decides Verin. “He’s probably going to bury those shoes somewhere though.”
“Yeah, I’ve never seen him wear something like that before,” muses Beau. “Is that a Dynasty style thing? Or a fuck you to the Umavi thing? Her heels were like, almost as high.”
“It was both,” smiles Verin. “The correct Dynasty style was taught to us both from a very young age. He was wearing heels long before he was considered an adult. He told me that, thanks to living in the Empire, he was enjoying not having to wear the correct heel height in order to be taken seriously.”
“Wow, more bullshit,” notes Beau, her hand on the door handle now.
“Endlessly,” agrees Verin. “You have no idea how many people don’t believe me when I say I dealt with more bullshit in Rosohna than in the army.”
He takes a moment to really take in the group in front of him. The worry and concern he has always carried for Essek has definitely ebbed this weekend, thanks to this group. Essek isn’t just safe with them, he is loved and he is happy. And as long as the Umavi doesn’t get her way, he’ll have everything he deserves with them.
“Jester has my number now, so I hope to hear from you all,” he tells them.
“I’m going to message you every day. And you’ve got to come visit us too, and see Essek,” Jester offers with one of her bright smiles.
“Yeah, we have bullshit in the Empire, but no dress code,” adds Beau. “Or den politics.”
“There’s still family politics, Beau,” Fjord points out with a look at her that is full of stories.
“And there’s dens too,” smiles Verin. “I couldn’t have asked for a better one for Essek.”
“We are a den?” asks Yasha, with a look that says she’s not sure if that’s a good thing or not. Considering her experiences this weekend, Verin doesn’t blame her.
“A pretty good one, I agree with Verin,” states Caduceus with his own warm smile. “We’re like his den, you know, different opinions and voices, support and care, and space for it all.”
Verin dips his head in thanks and can see Liriel’s clear pleasure at Cadeceus’s words. Caduceus had spent some time tonight talking with a few of Verin and Liriel’s den at the ball. Verin’s very pleased to hear his opinion of them. He’ll be sure to tell his Umavi later.
“How long has Essek been with the Umavi?” asks Beau, opening the door now and checking the hallway.
“If Celar came here right after she sent for him, she won’t be done yet,” Verin says, with sure experience. “I’ll show you the way.”
“I’ll meet you in Essek’s rooms,” Liriel tells him before they all file out.
“I’ll make sure we’re packed too. We should stay in our den house.”
Liriel smiles with pleasure and relief and kisses him briefly, “Yes. I’ll let our Umavi know.”
Verin can’t help smiling as he leads Caleb and Molly away from the library. It’s still so good to be able to call another den house home and another Umavi his Umavi. It’s just as good as being able to refer to Liriel as his husband, and as good as now being able to call Molly and Caleb his brother’s fiances. He’s going to do everything he can to see that he gets to call them Essek’s husbands soon.