GrimmShadows
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I'll Wipe Away the Frost on Your Eyelashes by floristkills for Anarchy_and_Piglins
Fandoms: Dream SMP
29 Oct 2025
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Summary
Not to brag, but Techno's a pretty great mechanic. And not just because his human hands have multiple dexterousness fingers. His skills have gotten him pretty far in the universe. Further than most humans can ever make it.
Almost literally, since humans can't survive faster than light travel.
With the near infinity of space, that little biological fact limits the mobility of their entire species. But, as humans tend to do, they have spent all their experience points on brains over functional bodies. Thus, a solution was created: cryopods.
Cryosleep makes it possible for Techno to travel through space, and his skills make it actually worthwhile for a ship's crew to even bother with him. It's going pretty well, all things considered. If only his body realized how critical it was not to get oh-so sleepy and achy after being frozen alive and thawed out. It really throws a wrench in his productivity.
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Techno is a human on a mixed species spaceship with Phil, Wilbur, and Tommy. All four crew members contend with the effects of popsicle-ification. Thawing procedure is most optimal with shared body heat, copious fur petting, and sugary offerings.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 66,249
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 220
- Kudos:
- 838
- Bookmarks:
- 177
- Hits:
- 12,636
Bookmarked by GrimmShadows
16 May 2026
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Summary
Alien’s were oblivious things.
Scoring a job with the Astral All Hands Company was scarily easy. After stealing a communion device, clothes to hide himself and threatening low life alien criminals into making him fake ID’s Techno was all set. No one asked twice about the fake planet that was listed on his ID or why they haven’t heard of it.
With all this in mind, Techno concludes that aliens are oblivious. It has to be in their nature to write things off because there’s so many species around, coming and going. The SBI crew was like everyone else in that regard. The second he stepped foot on their ship they acted as if he was always there. Like he was something dancing in the background having finally come to life.
But of course now that he’s living with them it’s hard to keep them oblivious. To keep them away from the truth. But he tries, even if it slowly becomes useless.
Or: The four times Techno keeps his human heritage a secret and the one time he learns what it really means to be human.
Series
- Part 1 of 🐚2023🐇
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,542
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 97
- Kudos:
- 3,249
- Bookmarks:
- 534
- Hits:
- 37,179
Bookmarked by GrimmShadows
10 May 2026
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Summary
He turned to Techno, "Big Man Tommy Innit at your service."
Wilbur let out a noise that sounded very much like a strangled seal. Tommy whipped his head around with the speed of a cobra, "Oi, what're you laughing at?"
They dissolved into an argument over whether or not Tommy was a Big Man while Philza sighed and rubbed at the space behind the feathers located near his ears. He turned around and led Techno up the gangplank while Tommy chased Wilbur around the loading area.
"I hope you recognize the terrible mistake you've made by agreeing to this job, mate."
Or: Techno is a human who hops on the SBI crew and is now trying to hide his trauma and humanity.
Series
- Part 1 of Techno in Space AU
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,428
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 379
- Kudos:
- 2,421
- Bookmarks:
- 318
- Hits:
- 32,536
Bookmarked by GrimmShadows
09 May 2026
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Technoblade’s Tips on Scamming the Government by DOC_Holliday
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
13 Nov 2021
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Summary
To be honest, the only good thing to come out of this scenario is the fact he doesn't have to pay for college anymore. That's a win in his book, because college was going to be very pricey and he wasn’t looking to be thousands of dollars in debt.
Or course, he was hoping to graduate high school first before going to college, and then maybe go into astrology. And then go into space. If he even wanted to study astrology or whatever you call looking at the stars and whatever NASA does.
Techno has skipped a few steps somewhere, and is now at the finish line before he has even started. Which is to say, he's currently in space. Further than even the moon, like Techno now has bragging rights for being the first human to ever venture out further than the moon. He’s never wanted these bragging rights, he's not even all that interested in space and those floating chunks of space rocks.
Or
I haven't yet seen a Human!Technoblade AlienAU yet so I wrote one
Series
- Part 2 of Mom! Doc is writing feel-good again!
- Part 1 of To Infinity- and BEYOND
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,245
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 443
- Kudos:
- 3,306
- Bookmarks:
- 451
- Hits:
- 29,594
Bookmarked by GrimmShadows
07 May 2026
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A Myriad of Miscommunications by TheHappySpider
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP
19 Mar 2024
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Summary
Technoblade is a human, abducted against his will and kept in a black market.
Phil, Wilbur, Tommy, Tubbo and Ranboo are looking for something to protect them from pirates.Or: Humans are Space Orcs and Wilbur thinks one would make a good guard dog.
Lots of miscommunication and a mix of perspectives.Series
- Part 1 of Miscommunications AU
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,825
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 600
- Kudos:
- 3,792
- Bookmarks:
- 491
- Hits:
- 50,336
Bookmarked by GrimmShadows
06 May 2026