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[Podfic] This is Better Than the Two Boats by motleyfam, read-for-you-by (captainafab)
Fandoms: The LEGO Batman Movie (2017), The LEGO Movie (2014), Batman - All Media Types
07 Dec 2025
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Everything should be fine now, except it isn't. Why does Batman still seem to brush Joker off? Why won't he listen to anything Joker says? Why won't he just get that they're supposed to be best enemies now?
Well. Maybe his roommate Bruce Wayne can help.
A LEGO Batman Movie (2017) Podfic of This is Better Than the Two Boats by Brokenpitchpipe.
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you might feel like you’re givin’ out by motleyfam for JBS_Forever
Fandoms: The Outsiders - S. E. Hinton, The Outsiders (1983), The Outsiders: The Musical - Jamestown Revival & Levine/Rapp
22 Nov 2025
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“He did what?” Darry blurts, causing Pony to glance back up. His brother’s expression has completely shifted, all traces of exasperation gone and replaced with sharp focus. “How long was he out for?”
“What’s going on?” Pony asks.
Darry holds up a finger, shushing him. “He’s alright though, yeah?” There’s a pause. “Shit.” Another pause. “How much blood are we talkin’ here?”
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Soda faints at work. His brothers fret.
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Step Aside, Paul Newman by motleyfam
Fandoms: The Outsiders - S. E. Hinton, The Outsiders (1983), The Outsiders: The Musical - Jamestown Revival & Levine/Rapp
14 Oct 2025
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Sighing, Pony lifts his head just enough that Darry can see the unfocused look in his eyes. “My head hurts real bad, alright? Everything’s too loud and the lights keep doing weird stuff.”
Darry’s brow furrows. “What do you mean ‘weird stuff’?”
Pony gives another small shrug. “I dunno, like…going in and out or something.”
The pieces are starting to fall into place in Darry’s addled brain and the picture they’re revealing isn’t a very pretty one. Just like their mother, Darry’s been getting migraines on and off ever since he hit puberty, but so far both his brothers have been spared the family curse.
It looks like Ponyboy’s luck has finally run out.
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Turkey with a Side of Stressin’ by motleyfam for justbeyondstars
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Super Sons (Comics)
16 Sep 2025
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What should be a wholesome family vacation turns into Tim’s personal hellscape when the Waynes decide to spend Thanksgiving at the Kent Farm.
Featuring an impromptu road trip, a packed-out farmhouse, an overeager grade-schooler, and a festive sprinkling of unresolved trauma.
(And pie, of course. There’s also pie.)
Series
- Part 11 of Settle Our Bones
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Accelerated Learning by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic)
22 May 2025
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“Tim,” Bruce says, “it’s driver’s ed.”
“You think I don’t know that?”
“It’s a graduation requirement.”
“I know,” Tim snaps. “And you know why I know? Because two different counselors and the freaking P.E. divisional head sat me down and explained it! I know.”
“Then how did you–”
“Because I wasn’t going to class, alright?!”
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After failing his mandatory driver’s education course, Tim’s family all pitch in to impart their collective knowledge. But it’s an unlikely member who finally gets him up to speed.
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All Things to All Men by motleyfam for justbeyondstars
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Batman (Comics)
13 May 2025
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Tim’s pretty sure that Jason hates him.
Granted, Jason hadn’t seemed to hate him yesterday and Tim has no idea what he did to cause Jason to come to this conclusion today— (and it’s not like Tim hasn’t been racking his brain for the answer to that very question ever since he woke up)— but the signs have been there all morning and the signs never lie. The sullen mood, the closed-off body language, the vague grunts and one-word responses to Tim’s few attempts at conversation… they all point to a singular conclusion.
Jason has finally gotten sick of him.
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Or, Jason starts acting weird while both Bruce and Alfred are out of town, and it dredges up some stuff for Tim.
Luckily, he’s still got one big brother left he can call.
Series
- Part 5 of Settle Our Bones
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*Recalibrating...* by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics)
12 Apr 2025
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Sometimes, Tim wonders if he’s cursed.
Like, actually cursed. By a witch or something. Because he can’t ever seem to catch a fucking break.
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Tim’s first sleepover in Bludhaven ends up going very much par for the course with this series.
Series
- Part 7 of Settle Our Bones
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is it all predetermined, am i playing a role? by motleyfam
Fandoms: The Outsiders - S. E. Hinton, The Outsiders (1983)
04 Jan 2025
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The baby is Soda’s.
Sandy is certain of it because she hasn’t cheated— not yet, anyway. She’d only taken the test just that morning and she hasn’t told a soul yet. She’s 16 years old and panicking because her life is about to be over.
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Moral Fiber by motleyfam
Fandoms: The Outsiders - S. E. Hinton, The Outsiders (1983), The Outsiders (TV 1990)
29 Dec 2024
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Really, if you think about it, this is all Two-Bit’s fault.
Maybe if Ponyboy hadn’t spent the last decade watching his buddy shoplift everything from candy bars, to cigarettes, to, on one memorable occasion, an entire rotisserie chicken, he wouldn’t have felt so confident in his ability to slip the little amber-colored bottle down his jacket sleeve right under the shopkeeper’s nose and all of this could have been avoided.
But then again, Two-Bit isn’t the one sitting in the back office of the little drugstore on 2nd and Main with his cheeks redder than a beetroot, praying to whoever up there might be listening to at least make it a swift death.
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Ponyboy gets busted for shoplifting. Darry is less than pleased.
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Bruce isn’t drunk. Jason knows that.
He knows that.
...So why can’t his body get the goddamn memo?
Series
- Part 8 of The Under 500 Club
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It was supposed to be an easy night.
Series
- Part 7 of The Under 500 Club
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Duke Thomas, M.D. by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic), Batman (Comics)
02 Sep 2024
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Duke comes down to the cave early one morning to find Tim in bad shape.
Series
- Part 6 of The Under 500 Club
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Smudge by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), The Batman (Movie 2022)
01 Sep 2024
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“I received another call from the boy’s school today.”
Bruce sighs heavily. “Is he still not eating?”
“According to his teacher, at lunch today Master Richard consumed six potato chips, discarded his sandwich and carrot sticks entirely, spent a few minutes attempting to balance the orange on the end of his nose, and then traded his cheese stick for a classmate’s novelty eraser—which I am told is shaped like a crocodile.”
Series
- Part 2 of Eat Like Birds
- Part 5 of The Under 500 Club
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Jason doesn't do well skipping meals.
Series
- Part 4 of Eat Like Birds
- Part 4 of The Under 500 Club
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Clinically Insignificant by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics)
02 Sep 2024
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Damian’s temperature is 99.6.
Series
- Part 3 of The Under 500 Club
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Reply ‘STOP’ to Unsubscribe by batmoniker, motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics)
05 Jul 2024
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It begins as it always does: palms sweating, shivers down his spine, echoes of the Ides of March…
(Okay, maybe not that.)
It actually begins with Marcie Danvers bursting into tears as she scrambles up onto her desk, shrieking something about how the walls and floor are crawling with spiders. Only, there are no spiders. And, even if there were, it doesn't explain Angela Sinclair desperately trying to open a window because ”the ship is going down!”
And then Jason’s phone lights up with a single text message from Tim:
My dad’s here
That's when Jason realizes what's happening.
Fucking fear toxin.
Between one rapid heartbeat and the next, the school has erupted into chaos.
Series
- Part 10 of Settle Our Bones
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You Must Be This Conscious to Ride by justbeyondstars, motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Batman (Comics)
19 May 2024
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For Tim’s fourteenth birthday, the Waynes take him to an amusement park. Unfortunately for them, this happens to coincide with a sweltering heatwave.
What could go wrong?
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In which the boys ride a few rollercoasters, play a riveting game of I Spy, cut a toddler in line for a corn dog, get a crash course in heat-related illnesses, and make memories to last a lifetime.
Series
- Part 8 of Settle Our Bones
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Rail-Splitter, Brain-Splitter by motleyfam for justbeyondstars
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Batman (Comics)
29 Apr 2024
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“What are the side effects?”
“Uh..." Tim scrolls down. “It says, dry mouth, dizziness, fatigue, headache, blurred vision, nausea, vomiting—”
Jason cuts him off, “So the side effects of migraine meds are fucking migraines?”
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For Jason's seventeenth birthday, Tim “wins” three tickets to the iconic off-Broadway stage production: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (The Musical). The night is going pretty well until Dick’s head decides to nope out.
Series
- Part 9 of Settle Our Bones
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Maui Melon Mint by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics), Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic)
08 Apr 2024
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“The analysis is complete. The bottle residue and samples we collected all tested positive for norovirus RNA—or, as it’s more commonly known, stomach flu.”
“Jesus take the wheel…” Timothy says under his breath, ducking his head and tapping his fingers to his forehead, chest, and each shoulder in the sign of the cross.
Damian rolls his eyes. “Aren’t you Jewish, Drake.”
“I am an immunocompromised agnostic who just sat through a four-hour stakeout with three people who are now puking their guts up,” he bites back. “I will take anyone who’s listening.”
Richard gives a weak snort. “So this is a literal Hail Mary?”
Timothy glares back. “You can shut up.”
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In the case of Bats vs. Stomach Bug, there can only be one victor.
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Lemon Lime by motleyfam
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Batman (Comics), Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic)
05 Mar 2024
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As a kid, Duke rarely ever got sick.
It was actually something of a running joke amongst his friends and classmates. They’d all be out at least a few times a year for the standard assortment of head colds and ear infections and stomach bugs, while Duke would spend three straight days getting coughed on by his lab partner and still finish off the semester with perfect attendance. He managed to dodge class-wide outbreaks of chickenpox, pink eye, and head lice. Once in fourth grade, he’d skinned both his knees playing freeze tag during recess, then had to explain to the baffled nurse who’d cleaned the blood off and applied Transformers bandaids that, no, he wasn’t new to the district, he’d actually been at that school since kindergarten, and yes, it was very nice to finally meet her.
Of course, the flip side to rarely ever falling ill is that whenever something does slip past his body’s defenses, he feels woefully unprepared...