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electric blue by loosingletters
Fandoms: 내가 키운 S급들 - 근서 | S-Classes that I Raised - Geunseo, 내가 키운 S급들 | The S-Classes That I Raised (Webcomic)
08 Jul 2024
Tags
Summary
“Because we always ate them,” Han Yoohyun replies. “You like them.”
“I like them,” Han Yoojin repeats as though he’s trying to confirm something for himself. “Right.”
Han Yoohyun buys food he and his brother used to eat when they still lived together.
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Constellations by liketolaugh
Fandom Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
10 Jan 2024
- Words:
- 314,190
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 1,148
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
08 Jan 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
Percy annabeth nico some pjo cast jet mike rose Lucy gets therapy. The Fic. So good. Poseidon cares for his son. Hermes n mr d too. Raine is so precious and i love this so much tq for being my first fic in the pjo series
“I was pleased,” Percy said. “Relieved, even. We- I mean, we killed them and they didn’t die because we didn’t have a god on our side, and now we did. Problem solved. I almost laughed at a couple points, because he showed up and started insulting the giants – um, they were like, the anti-Dionysus, so they were obsessed with upstaging him. Lots of theater stuff. And Bacchus just went around telling them their show was tacky.” He almost smiled, but the urge vanished quickly. “And then Jason kinda hinted at wanting to get on with it, and... Bacchus told us to go ahead.”“How did you feel then?”
“Confused,” Percy said quietly. “Then annoyed. Then fucking furious.” He took a breath. “I don’t understand. I don’t understand. Why didn’t he care? Why was he acting like this didn’t have anything to do with him? Mà tḕn Hestia, these were his enemies. They were trying to upstage him, they were born and designed to kill him. Why did he just sit there?”
“But you fought anyway,” Raine prompted softly.
“I had to,” Percy said, voice cracking again. “We had to. They wouldn’t have let us get away, not when Gaea told them to kill us, and- and someone had to make sure they died! Someone had to put a, a fucking ounce of effort into making sure Gaea didn’t rise! And apparently Mr. D wasn’t going to do it!” He couldn’t see for the tears clouding his eyes. “Apparently none of the gods were going to do it!”
Percy started sobbing, loudly. He muffled it into his stuffed shark, trying not to disturb the other patients, and Raine waited patiently while he cried.
When maybe a fraction of his hurt and betrayal had soaked into the soft toy, Percy’s breath started to even out, and eventually he managed to suck in enough deep breaths to speak again.
“Mr. D watched me grow up,” he said at last, voice shaking so badly that it would be a miracle if Raine understood him. “He’s known me since I was twelve, he, he’s knocked on my cabin door to talk to me, he taught me how to play pinochle. He... was he going to just watch me die?”
“You know I can’t answer that for you,” Raine murmured. Percy hugged the toy.
“I know,” he admitted, exhaustion weighing down his voice. “I just... I really thought he cared.”
“Betrayal hits you hard,” Raine acknowledged softly. “If you want to try and salvage your opinion of him, perhaps you could ask Mr. D about it, see if he isn’t responsible for Bacchus’ actions after all. If you don’t...” She shook her head. “No one would blame you.”
Percy’s throat tightened again, and he swallowed twice before he replied.
“I don’t know if I’m that brave,” he admitted. “I mean... I think I’d feel better if I knew for sure that Bacchus didn’t care about the people Mr. D does. But what if he does? What if he just laughs in my face for ever thinking he gave a shit? I, I don’t know what I’d do.”
“I can’t answer that for you,” Raine repeated quietly.
Percy nodded numbly, and then pushed determinedly past the conversation.
“It was a huge relief when the Argo showed up,” he said. “Jason and I are good, but we were exhausted. Ephialtes would have killed us if they hadn’t shown up when they did.” He exhaled. “And then Bacchus came down and started... strutting around, showing off to the crowd, like he was this grand finale. And that was it. He came over, told us to continue our quest, and...”
The blood drained from Percy’s face.
“Percy?” Raine called worriedly.
Percy coughed, pressing the back of his hand to his mouth, but the anti-nausea med seemed to be working, and it didn’t go any further than that. He struggled to gain control of his breath, and after a moment he reached for Montauk, calling up the vivid memory of campfire smoke and corn chips and sea wind.
When he felt ready, he pushed himself back up, oddly exhausted by the effort.
“He, he told me,” Percy rasped, “that... that my voyage would be harder than I expected, a-and... he told me where to find Annabeth.” He swallowed. “We fell into Tartarus less than an hour later.” His fists clenched. “Maláka! Aischrós koprophágos mētrokoítēs! Bínei heautoû! Rhaphanidoû!”
He had more to say, but it wasn’t really making him feel any better, so he stopped, hugging Fang tightly instead.
“Do you think he knew?” Raine asked delicately.
“He definitely knew,” Percy snapped, slumping back in misery. “Coward. Coward. He’d probably piss himself if someone even suggested he go to Tartarus and he just, he just stood there and smiled.” He hugged himself and shuddered. “I... no. I don’t want to talk about that any more right now. Sorry.”
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Tags
Summary
Changbin and Jisung help Chan celebrate a milestone. What ensues is a scene of tender care shared between three boys who love each other very much.
(or, a love letter to the soulmatery of 3racha.)
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
31 May 2025
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Tags
Summary
These are the kids I want to debut with. They’re the ones I want to do this with.
And they'll do this together.
Where eight people fall down and pick each other back up again, and again, and again.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,150
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 47
- Kudos:
- 669
- Bookmarks:
- 163
- Hits:
- 8,261
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
19 Apr 2025
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lyrics of an improvised love song by orphan_account for melodics
Fandoms: Stray Kids (Band)
20 Jul 2019
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Summary
Minho is behind the counter, taking orders and misspelling names. Since it’s a university, the coffee shop is fairly full, with a constant background noise of people talking.
Then, out of nowhere, the talking stops, and the thing happens, one of those moments where everybody just collectively decides to fall silent, but one unfortunate soul doesn’t get the memo. In specific, a guy with brown hair and a blue t-shirt sighs into the dead quiet, “Dammit, somebody date me.”
There’s a second where the guy doesn’t realize anything is wrong, but then his expression freezes, and he shrinks down in his seat. Minho is amused, embarrassed on his behalf, all normal reactions. And then the impulse kicks in, the urge to pick the most idiotic and unconventional choice just because he can.
“Okay,” Minho replies, and everybody in the room looks at him. “I will.”
[It isn't fake, but it isn't real, either. Until suddenly, it is.]
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,408
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 169
- Kudos:
- 6,923
- Bookmarks:
- 1,458
- Hits:
- 68,816
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
06 Mar 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Ur honor theyre so stupid
omfg that am-bush JOKE WAS SOO GOOD AHAHAHAH -
through the looking-glass by unluckyolive
Fandoms: 전지적 독자 시점 - 싱숑 | Omniscient Reader - Sing-Shong
27 Jun 2022
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Summary
Kim Dokja slaps his hands over Yoo Joonghyuk’s mouth without really thinking.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he says frantically.
He feels Yoo Joonghyuk’s lips curve into a frown under his palm, ticklish and hot against that sensitive skin. He ekes out an odd sound and jerks back, yelping again when the back of his head collides with the wall.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s expression turns more bewildered than reprimanding. “What is with you?”
The Fourth Wall comes down. Kim Dokja realizes he’s been relying on it more than he thought.
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word-woven garden by Scribblurri
Fandoms: 전지적 독자 시점 - 싱숑 | Omniscient Reader - Sing-Shong
15 Aug 2022
Tags
Summary
It's a gradual but certain realization, that the words and letters of the story he loves so much— of the story that helped him live until this point— were going to kill him, too.
And what a stupid way to go, he thinks. Of all things, for loving a story too much.
(Even as the years pass by, petals and leaves have collected between the pages of his books, serving as bookmarks for pages he's reread time and time again. The petals get bigger as he flips from front to back.
He doesn't dare trample on this proof of his love, even as it kills him.)
(or: Dokja loves a story too much, and coughs up flowers while he's at it. Not much changes.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 80,344
- Chapters:
- 17/?
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 585
- Kudos:
- 1,870
- Bookmarks:
- 535
- Hits:
- 37,533
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
15 Oct 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
OH MY FUCKING GOD I DIDNT BOOKMARK THIS??? I GOT SO FUCKING SCARED FOFR A SECOND I THOUGHT I LOST U... OMG.... I LOVE THIS FANFIC SO FCKN MUCH U DONT UDNERSTANDAAA IM SO RELIEVED
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paper cuts by HamsterQinghua
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
29 Jul 2023
Tags
Summary
The next day, Suguru finds Gojo nursing a bandaid on the bridge of his nose. He can’t help the thrill of glee that runs up his spine when the other begrudgingly moves his feet off of the desk when Suguru approaches.
Suck it, he wants to say when he sees the scowl on Gojo’s face. Instead, Suguru smiles.
“Hey,” he starts. “I think we got off on the wrong foot.” Understatement of the century. “My name’s Suguru Geto, what’s yours?” It’s a question asked purely for formalities, and he’s sure Gojo knows that, but he’s still unprepared for the other’s answer.
“Your mom,” Gojo drawls out, and Suguru realizes he’s starting to see why people want this kid dead.
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or, Suguru is a contract killer. his final target is Satoru Gojo. this isn't a problem until it is.
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prove me wrong by indefinitelyforever
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
22 Feb 2024
Tags
Summary
Suguru frowns down at the bruise, using a thumb to run along the edge of it before he lets out a scoff. “It's not even well made. It's all sloppy.”
“Eh-?” Satoru tenses, squirming between Suguru's arms. “Suguru, what–“
“I could make a better one.” Suguru's voice is low, barely a murmur. “That's just lazy work.”Satoru shows up to class with a hickey on his neck. Suguru gets a little jealous.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,151
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 335
- Kudos:
- 9,061
- Bookmarks:
- 2,224
- Hits:
- 100,106
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
12 Aug 2024
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cerulean skies by HamsterQinghua
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
20 Jun 2023
Tags
Summary
“I’m in love with Satoru,” Suguru says again.
“So you’ve said,” Shoko says, sounding wearier than she has any right to be. “You want the good news or the bad news?” Suguru opens his mouth to answer, but Shoko apparently deems the answer unnecessary as she continues. “The good news is I’ve figured out what’s wrong with you, the bad news is that you probably won’t like it.”
Suguru stares at Shoko, hoping he doesn’t have to vocalize his obvious question.
“Whatever’s blocking your cursed energy also has the ability to stop you from saying certain things—specifically, lies,” she clarifies. “Basically, your body is forcing you to tell only the truth for the time being.” She shrugs. “If you try to resist, well. You know what happens.”
Suguru continues staring at Shoko.
“So it’s true, then?” he says slowly. “I’m in love with Satoru?”
---
or, Suguru ingests a curse that forces him to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth
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Russian translation available here!
Ukrainian translation available here!- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,528
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 197
- Kudos:
- 7,657
- Bookmarks:
- 1,207
- Hits:
- 41,528
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
12 Aug 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
theyre such stupid clowns i love them so much
“What is it,” Satoru demands, and Suguru drags his gaze from the top of Satoru’s head back to his eyes. Suguru tries to back up, but finds his back hitting a wall.Is Satoru… kabedon-ing him?
“What is what?” Suguru asks, but he’s a little preoccupied with the way Satoru keeps inching into his space.
Satoru backs up, but only to whip his sunglasses off his head in a dramatic fashion and spread his arms out, the glasses dangling from one hand. “The secret,” he demands, and Suguru’s heart drops into his shoes. “Your greatest secret, the one you’ve apparently told Shoko sooooo many times but haven’t even mentioned once to me.” He leans in again, his brows slanted. “I might even be hurt, Suguru.”
Satoru’s tone is cold, but Suguru knows him well enough to detect the actual hurt lingering behind his words.
..
“Suguru, you’re not dying, right?”Suguru raises his hands up in a placating manner. “I’m not dying, Satoru, it’s just that—”
He’s cut off before he can continue by an indignant Satoru. “Then what is it?”
Suguru’s never wished more for a natural disaster to spontaneously occur. His luck seems to have run dry, because the earth does not, in fact, crack open and swallow Suguru whole, and instead, as he attempts to clamp his mouth shut, he feels unfortunately familiar physical sensations—his face starts going flushed from the sudden struggle to breathe, the breaths he can get out are short and hurried, and he’s pretty sure his legs are going to fall out on him at any moment.
Satoru recognizes this, because of course he does, and his expression twists to be more anguished than Suguru’s ever seen. Suguru despises himself at that moment, for being the person to put that expression on Satoru’s face.
“Suguru,” Satoru says quietly. “Is it so bad that I’d know that you’d rather choke on your own words?”
This isn’t how I wanted you to know, Suguru so desperately wants to say, but he knows the actual words that’ll come out of his mouth before they upheave themselves onto the ground below them.
“I’m in love with you,” the words come out in a rushed gasp, and although Suguru’s relieved to breathe easily again, he’s not exactly relieved by the astonished look on Satoru’s face when the words hit him. Suguru thinks maybe that’s it, but more words push against his diaphragm. “I’m so fucking in love with you that it’s annoying, sometimes. I’ve been in love with you since the first time you took your sunglasses off in front of me—you’re really fucking beautiful, you know?” Shut up, Suguru’s voice screams at himself. “That’s why my favorite color’s blue, it’s always been blue, it’s only been blue since I met you.”
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Well, I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star by HotCocoaaa
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga)
16 May 2021
Tags
Summary
“You bought me milk. Why’d you get me this flavor?” He demanded, only a little below a shout, and with white dripping from his equally colorless hair into his eyes and down his slim nose, Satoru stared at him in shock.
“It...doesn’t bother your acid reflux, much,” Satoru stumbled, eyes wide, brows drawn, and entirely bewildered as the hurt melted away into plain confusion, like Suguru was nuts and not everything else. Suguru felt his heart lurch to a stop. He was going to be so dizzy when he wasn’t currently losing his mind. God, there was already bile inching up his throat. For a second, he wished fervently that he’d drank the damn thing instead of thrown it.
“How the fuck did even you know I have that?” He yelled, entirely at his wits end and not a clue how to find his way back to sanity, because this was nuts, it was beyond fucking nuts- and Satoru blinked, eyes still wide, but like he thought it was obvious.
“You’re you,” he said, entirely disbelievingly, and Suguru was going to have a stroke.
Series
- Part 2 of I know you (but I don't know how)
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
11 Aug 2024
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Tags
Summary
Getō comes back as a ghost and has less than three days to repossess their body. Luckily, their parents have much more experience with the whole 'being dead' thing and are happy to help. The only problem is fucking everything.
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
07 Aug 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
im going to scream this is so well written
split ends kenjaku geto, satosugu meeting and them having their first kiss in front of getos parents
THE PARENT CHILD ANGST?!?!??? OMGG -
Tags
Summary
“You realize,” Suguru says, tugging lightly his binding, the seals suppressing his cursed energy, and he can only just barely keep the molten frustration on his tongue from burning the flat silk of his voice, “that this is a kidnapping.”
“So harsh!” Tsukumo laughs, “Think of it as a dubiously consensual internship! Fully paid, 'promise!”
//OR: Tsukumo sees the blaring red flags painted all over Getō, and decides to do something about it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,332
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 342
- Kudos:
- 2,255
- Bookmarks:
- 797
- Hits:
- 26,481
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
05 Aug 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
this story is so so so precious to me. gently holding your hand on the cliff and gently walking you back. fuckkkk
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Tags
Summary
If I don't love Suguru like that, Satoru thinks, then I won't ever love anyone like that.
OR: stsg but make them aromantic.
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and still i will live here by themoonisdead
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
23 Mar 2022
Tags
Summary
“I killed those people.” Suguru is speaking too slowly. Satoru knows with certainty, and therefore dread, that the morality martyr is getting weird ideas. “Two of them, and I killed them both.”
“I figured.” Satoru does not care. Not about the dead men, and only barely about the little girls.
“Maybe you should kill me.” As if saying it once is not enough, into the shocked silence, Suguru nods, and repeats, “Yeah. You should kill me. That would have meaning.”
And, y’know what? That's enough of that, fuck that bastard, really.
or: stsg stress-adopt several children
Series
- Part 1 of better with you
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,966
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 97
- Kudos:
- 2,518
- Bookmarks:
- 462
- Hits:
- 27,770
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
03 Aug 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
i love stsg angst and heartbreak and the reconciliation is so so soooo good agh
Satoru’s voice does not tremble but it is close when he demands, “What the hell are you saying? You have access to unlimited curse techniques, there’s no way you're behind me. There's no way you could ever be.” He swallows. That is not the most important thing. It is time to take responsibility. “I know—I know we’ve been off since I messed up with Riko, but even if it is possible I am never going to leave you behind, Suguru.”So don't you leave me, either.
It is silent for a quarter second too long. Should he not have brought up Riko? Should he have brought her up in a different way? I fucked up and you had to watch her die. Don't you hate me? Hate me out loud, don't hate yourself in the dark where I can't reach.
Suguru tightens his grip around the base of Satoru’s throat, a reminder, maybe, that his Infinity is off, that Suguru has access to his lifeline—like he needs one for that—a bid for his focused attention. He has it; Satoru’s eyes are wide and bright and all six are zeroed in on the little pout decorating Suguru’s face which is. Yeah. Very rude.
“You know I hate repeating myself, Satoru, and I can tell you’re not even listening to me.”
“Suguru.” Satoru wants to scream. Something has to be comfort, for shit’s sake. Satoru cradles his jaw between his palms, forcing Suguru’s attention to stay on him, his thumbs gently, insistently, holding his face in place. He’s so stubborn, and that’s part of why he loves him, obviously, but it's annoying that he's pretty enough to get away with it regardless. “Every word you have ever said is burned into my chest and tangled in my soul. I am always listening to you.”
Suguru blinks. He opens his mouth, stares. His hand slips, gets caught on Satoru’s chest, gripping the fabric over his heart. Satoru stares into his eyes and rapidly loses his patience. “What? Wait. You—seriously? No, really. Do… do you. Sa—”
“Don't make me explain it all here, man. That’s a dick move, and it’s manipulative as shit. I won't say it here. Just—you’re worth it. To me. Even when it’s difficult and impossible and complicated. You will always be worth saving.” Suguru is still perfecting his breathing technique apparently, as if he didn’t know, and Satoru feels rubbed raw in a way that makes him lash out. “The voice in your head that tells you to be alone and commit murder isn't your friend, you dumb bitch, I am. So, yeah, fuck you with a rusted spoon for that kill me shit you tried to pull. Let’s go home. We’ll go with my idea until we come up with a better one, you depressed pinetree bastard.”
- “You don’t want to be alone at the top so you pretend there’s space for me”
- “You will always be worth saving.”
- “The voice in your head that tells you to be alone and commit murder isn't your friend, you dumb bitch, I am.”
- “Didn't anyone ever tell you two morons that children don't save a failing marriage?”
- “It’s a bad look to baselessly call women liars just to fit your own narrative, Suguru." -
Tags
Summary
The first time Team 7 meets their new jounin sensei, Naruto is admittedly unimpressed.
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
31 Jul 2024
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Summary
Jujutsu sorcerers always die alone, but to die, you gotta live first, and nobody lives entirely by themself.
- Words:
- 23,532
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 663
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
31 Jul 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
im made myself sad. i am happy. so good
Kites, Strings, and Hidden Things (yuuji and gojo(
and
All the Lonely People (nobara n gojo)
r both phemnonal -
life hack: gay thoughts can't catch u if u have limitless activated by sugurugetowo
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime)
08 Jan 2021
Tags
Summary
Satoru doesn't moan.
He doesn’t. He just... breathes. Very loudly.
Oh god. Is he gay?
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Tags
Summary
“I haven’t written poetry since I was twelve,” he tells her, feeling stupid and pathetic and pining. “I hate poetry.”
“You’re literally writing it right now.”
“I know,” Satoru says miserably. “This is all Suguru's fault.”
// OR: the one where Satoru pines, and everyone suffers.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,747
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 68
- Kudos:
- 2,491
- Bookmarks:
- 513
- Hits:
- 15,689
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
31 Jul 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
THEYRE SUCH IDIOTS AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Tags
Summary
“A curse that hates humans but treats us like this?” Six-Eyes’ voice is lilted incredulously. “That’s even more interesting. It makes me wonder, y’know—you never did answer when I asked what could’ve made a curse like you.”
Suguru sighs, smile dropping ever-so-slightly. “It’s very rude,” he drawls, “to ask a curse their origin, especially if they’ve already denied answer.”
///OR: the one where Getō is a millennium-old curse with an abnormal amount of moral agency and Gojō is very, very interested
Series
- Part 3 of Author's Favorites (JJK)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,707
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 15
- Comments:
- 379
- Kudos:
- 13,522
- Bookmarks:
- 3,577
- Hits:
- 112,066
Bookmarked by Fluffyy
29 Jul 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Suguru eyes the contents. Takes one of the vegetable tempura pieces between his fingers, brings it to his lips, past his teeth, and—
“Ah.”
Sour. Sweet. Mildly prickly.
“I don’t hear a ‘tasteless’,” it’s so smug, the expression on Satoru face, so ridiculous, the prideful tint to his tone. “So good you’re speechless, right?”
Suguru swallows the tempura. Takes one of the riceballs. Sour. Sweet. Mildly prickly. How absolutely ludicrous, the amount of effort this would have taken… what Satoru has done is made imbued cursed energy into each ingredient. It’s not even a thin coating of cursed energy, it’s truly fused with the food. Few things conduct cursed energy well, and these ingredients decidedly do not. This is a bento box just so much as it is an exhibit-worthy display of skill in cursed energy manipulation.
“...Annoyance,” he says, after swallowing the onigiri. “That’s what you used as the base for this, right?”
Satoru beams. “Yep!”
...
I’m already impressed, Suguru almost says, I haven’t eaten something that tasted well but wasn’t either a human body or curse in—I don’t even know. This is something I can actually enjoy eating. That’s sort of surreal, you know?||
“Is that…?”Satoru follows his interest. “Oh—right. I was in the middle of making your bento when you called.”
“Oh.”
“It just a first draft,” Satoru says, and it’s unfair that he can just say things like that; that he’s making drafts of Suguru’s bento as if he could ever deserve that sort of care and attention put into a simple meal.
Quietly, Suguru slips from the couch, from Satoru, and makes his way across the apartment. His socks are silent against the kitchen tiles. The bento box is halfway hidden between miscellaneous ingredients, and the composition inside is obviously still in progress. Suguru takes it anyway, holding the open box carefully as he wordlessly sits himself back down on the couch beside Satoru.
Satoru, who’s looking at him with wide eyes that seem almost lost.
“Wait it’s not done...”
Suguru ignores him, picking up an umeboshi, slipping it past his teeth. Sour with annoyance. He tries a cube of tofu next. Sweet with anger. Grief-bitter rice. The red bean paste within the onigiri is steeped rich with loneliness. The cucumber slices are hot with frustration. Helplessness flavors the sweet potato tempura salty-sweet.
Slowly, he reaches into the shifting mass below his robes and pulls out a plastic bag. Drops it in Satoru’s lap.
His snowy brows furrow. “What...”
“From America,” Suguru says, clipped. “Souvenirs. For you.”
“Oh. You—thanks.”
Suguru returns to the bento. There isn’t much left.
It’s imperfect. The density and degree that cursed energy has properly infused the ingredients varies. Portions of the rice, especially, are completely tasteless. Beyond that, there’s clearly been a good deal of simple guessing with which taste a given emotion will produce. Some clash terribly.
Suguru inhales out a shaky breath. There’s a root cause behind each flavor, emotion, a story Suguru doesn’t know but wants to learn.
“...That awful feeling of betraying you own moral standards,” he finally says, and setting the bento box down to the coffee table with a soft clack, and he doesn’t look at Satoru’s expression, “the guilt and shame and anger and hatred of it. That self-cannibalizing emotion of knowing you’ve done something wrong. That’s—” he clears his throat. “That’s what I was born from.”
“Oh,” Satoru says, and Suguru doesn’t look at him; doesn’t want to see his expression.
“It’s—it’s inevitable that I’ll snap like that,” Suguru says, “it’s in my nature, the very thing that governs my core. I can get—have gotten better at managing it, but I’ll always betray my own moral standards. It’s inevitable. It’ll happen again, and again, and again after that.”
“Okay,” Satoru says, after a moment, and Suguru finally looks at him; the sincerity spilled across his unsmiling face, the lack of anything harsh at all—no disgust or judgment or hate, just a plain openness. “Then call me next time, too, and the time after that, and that, and that.”
He says it like it’s simple, as if Suguru hasn’t struggled with this for a millennium, as if it’s something that can be solved so easily, as if all Suguru has to do is call him and it’ll be alright. As if this isn’t the first time someone has stopped him. He makes it seem so simple, and maybe, maybe—
“You make it sound so simple.”
“Can’t it be?”
maybe, with Satoru, it can be that simple.
Suguru pushes into Satoru pressing his head into the crook of Satoru’s neck, and laughs. It rumbles from his core, light and heavy all at once, many toned and real. It shakes his entire being, cursed energy trembling with it, with this electric, weightless feeling. He wants to cry.
WAAA THIS IS SO GOOD