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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “I feel really good about this kid, I think he could be great on your wing, he just needs some help settling in. Someone to show him the ropes.”

    “Yes.”

    The line went silent for a moment. Ilya wasn’t really sure why his coach felt the need to run this by him.

    “Rozanov,” his coach said at last. “I want him to live with you.”

    Ilya blinked, then nearly shouted into the phone. “What?”

    * * *

    or, Ilya stays in Boston, gets a rookie, and tries to figure out how to make a secret long distance relationship work while there's a Russian teenager in his house

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    138,759
    Chapters:
    20/20
    Comments:
    5,221
    Kudos:
    13,134
    Bookmarks:
    4,403
    Hits:
    379,315

    24 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Getting information out of Ilya about his family was like getting blood from stone. Maybe harder. It had been one of the first things Shane had noticed about him. Any questions about his parents – the kind of typical things Shane’s mom had taught him to ask to make polite conversations – would result in brusque, emotionless answers or, worse, actual anger.

    But somewhere out there was Irina’s granddaughter. The only remaining blood relative that Ilya gave a shit about.

    And Ilya could never go back, which was Shane’s fault.

    So that bothered him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    40,355
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    109
    Kudos:
    593
    Bookmarks:
    204
    Hits:
    6,026

    24 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shrugging one shoulder far more casually than he possibly feels, Ilya says, “I like both. Is secret, okay?”

    “Okay,” Hollander says, voice cracking.

    He doesn’t say anything else. The air’s so heavy around them that it feels like being in the middle of a scrum, the weight and heat of all those bodies pressing down on you. Danger always feels like hockey; it’s the most dangerous thing Ilya knows, except for this. Everything dangerous in his life involves men’s bodies and just how close he can get to them. Closer than he probably should.

    A year after mysteriously dropping out of the 2009 draft, Shane Hollander is signed by the Boston Raiders, right behind Ilya Rozanov. Having the two biggest stars in the league on the same line is great for Boston — but playing alongside their worst rival was never exactly in Shane or Ilya's plans. Especially not when staying away from each other starts to feel just as impossible as getting along.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    222,222
    Chapters:
    28/28
    Comments:
    16,408
    Kudos:
    37,675
    Bookmarks:
    15,110
    Hits:
    1,715,464

    16 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Coming this fall to ABC… MLH star Shane Hollander is The Bachelor!

    Bachelor Nation, we have one question: will you accept this rose?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    62,964
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    1,499
    Kudos:
    3,149
    Bookmarks:
    1,123
    Hits:
    53,528

    16 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    After Vegas, Shane begins to give up on Ilya and looks for a new way to feel wanted.

    Ilya, of course, finds out about this and locks in.

    A small dose of jealousy and a bigger dose of communication add up to change the trajectory of their affair from 2014 onward.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,141
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    1,915
    Kudos:
    11,597
    Bookmarks:
    3,402
    Hits:
    162,747

    16 May 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya is not going to steal Shane Hollander's dog. That would be illegal. And wrong. And someone would probably find out and make Ilya give him back.

    So. Not stealing.

    But there is nothing wrong with giving Chernysh all the pats and treats that he deserves, is there?

    Nothing wrong with encouraging Chernysh to spend more and more time at Ilya's house until he doesn't even remember who Hollander is.

    Because Hollander is stupid and boring and does not deserve a dog as good as Chernysh. No, he doesn't, does he? Because Chernysh is the best boy in the whole world, yes he is.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    68,350
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    2,022
    Kudos:
    6,259
    Bookmarks:
    2,475
    Hits:
    81,926

    13 May 2026

  7. Public Bookmark 3

    Tags
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    49
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    126

    10 May 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Hollander’s eyes slid past him, stopped, came back and held, his eyes widening. Ilya smiled, a mocking curve of his mouth, and raised his cup in acknowledgment. Number one, he mouthed, and while he couldn’t be certain in the dim light of the bar, he thought he saw Hollander flush.

    Then his chin lifted, challenging, and Ilya felt something hook behind his ribs, a sharp tug, like a fish on a line.

     

    Or: Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander make a deal - whichever of them debuts as a #1 NYT bestseller owes the other a blowjob

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,370
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    2,734
    Kudos:
    2,452
    Bookmarks:
    1,095
    Hits:
    50,759

    05 May 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Sometimes life came at you with a clenched fist and Ilya had never figured out how to duck.

    So here he was, twenty-eight years old, single, dealing with the fallout from injuries given to him by the game he loved, and the second youngest assistant coach in the league to one of the worst teams. Stability was hard to come by, but he was managing.

    Then along came Shane Hollander to knock him on his ass, one more time.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    102,971
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Comments:
    6,840
    Kudos:
    22,431
    Bookmarks:
    9,869
    Hits:
    589,283

    27 Apr 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Are you going insane? What’s happening?”

    Ilya lays a palm over the side of his face, clawing thumb into soft after Hollander tries to swat him off. “You’re at my house and you came here to get fucked. Then you will leave, after. Do you forget more? Your name is Shane Hollander and you pretend to love hockey but your real love is taking it up the ass. You cry, most of the time. But you like crying, too.”

    -

    or: Instead of going to the cottage, Ilya moves to Florida.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,979
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    163
    Kudos:
    700
    Bookmarks:
    168
    Hits:
    5,782

    24 Apr 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

     

     
    After Ilya breaks Shane's heart in Sochi, Shane builds a life out of control.

    Three cups. Captaincy. Precision. Routine. Emptiness.

    When no achievement manages to make him feel anything, he turns to a mysterious phone service instead.

    Intimate in ways that should be impossible between strangers. A man who understands exactly how to pull Shane apart without ever touching him. Who gives him structure instead of chaos. Relief instead of performance.

    Shane finds himself pulled toward something he thought he buried years ago.

    ----

    Or:
    Set 4 years after Sochi, where both Ilya and Shane were left with shattered hearts, this is a story about second chances and being brave enough to trust again. To want anew.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    197,827
    Chapters:
    26/26
    Comments:
    1,743
    Kudos:
    2,159
    Bookmarks:
    1,249
    Hits:
    81,083

    21 Apr 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Galina stopped writing to look at Ilya. "Do you think he'd be willing to talk to you next time it happens, even if it's late?"

    Ilya's stomach turned over. He didn't even want to consider it, but he knew the answer. "Yes. But he silences his phone at night."

    "Most phones these days have an option to let certain numbers ring through, even on Do Not Disturb. Do you think he'd be open to setting that up for you?"

    Imagining that conversation made Ilya nauseous. Yes, no fucking doubt, Shane would be open to it if Ilya explained the reason. "I'm not going to ask him to do that."

    Set during The Long Game, an alternate version where the plane scene doesn't happen. Instead, there's this: a car crash, a therapist's duty to report, and an urgent reckoning with priorities.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,182
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    375
    Kudos:
    3,707
    Bookmarks:
    985
    Hits:
    42,874

    18 Apr 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane Hollander is a man who thrives on structure, routine, the solid ground of a ten-year plan. Ilya likes that about him, likes the embracing squeeze of having a life organized in tandem with Shane.

    No one would call Ilya a man who thrives on structure. But it’s there, if not in his DNA then in the patterns of his brain. A call-and-response of: they do this, I do that.

    When Ilya’s life is flayed open for the world to dissect, how will they push-and-pull their way back towards what was once a well-organized life?


    “I thought we could go through the schedules and figure out what days we’ll be in the same cities this season, or when either of us have a couple of days off in a row. Maybe make a shared calendar, so we c—”

    “A sex calendar? Your parents are arriving in thirty minutes, and you are proposing making a sex calendar?” Oh, this was delicious. He’d be able to eat out on this for years, if Shane was willing to give him that long.

    “It’s not a sex calendar! It’s just … when we might be able to see each other,” he finished, already sounding defeated.

    “And what are you planning on doing when we are seeing each other? Not fucking?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,947
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Collections:
    10
    Comments:
    3,745
    Kudos:
    10,526
    Bookmarks:
    4,358
    Hits:
    180,895

    14 Apr 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Jaw Man flicked his middle finger up at Ilya, who didn’t seem to mind, and gestured towards Shane and Hayden with raised eyebrows. “The f*** are you even doing right now, man.”

    Ilya said briefly, “Orgy.”

    “Uh,” said Shane, “no, that’s not—”

    Ilya grinned at him. It was a mean-edged grin but something about it seemed to suggest that he was joking with Shane, rather than about him. “Oh, he speaks.”

    “We’re not here for an orgy,” Shane said to Jaw Man. “We’re missionaries with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,138
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    885
    Kudos:
    3,538
    Bookmarks:
    1,158
    Hits:
    32,313

    13 Apr 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane finds out on Twitter.

    Not from a lawyer or a teammate or even one of the journalists who've been calling nonstop since the FanMail video went viral. He finds out at 6:47 am, still in bed, that Russia is coming for Ilya. Propaganda charges. Passport revocation. Return to the Russian Federation required.

    What follows is weeks of watching everything fall apart. Ilya's career. Their safety. The system that was supposed to protect them. Shane keeps playing while Ilya can't. The lawyers file paperwork and say to wait. Montreal demands silence.

    Shane faces a choice: keep his head down and trust the process, or burn down his career and force the world to pay attention.

    He chooses fire.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,498
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    894
    Kudos:
    6,144
    Bookmarks:
    1,768
    Hits:
    67,764

    13 Apr 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "Why are you not scared?"

    "I am scared," Ilya admits. "I just am tired. Of hiding me. Of hiding you. Of hiding how much I love you. I want to go to the rink— how do you say it? Authenti."

    "Authentically," Shane supplies, automatically.

    "Yes. Authentically. I want to go to the rink authentically, as me," Ilya confirms.

    Ilya looks at Shane, pauses until Shane meets his eyes. "I want to say: I, Ilya Rozanov, love a man, and that man's name is Shane Hollander."

     

    -

    Or, sometimes it takes a little more time, and some courage, to be with the one you love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    81,933
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    4,389
    Kudos:
    20,115
    Bookmarks:
    9,067
    Hits:
    520,394

    12 Apr 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    If Shane had had a good, close friend, a confidante, somebody he could talk to about whatever was happening between him and Ilya Rozanov, and that good close friend got it in their head that maybe Shane liked Ilya, had feelings for him, one of the first things Shane would say to refute it would be: but he smokes.

    Shane, Ilya, cigarettes - a love triangle for the ages.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,676
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    567
    Kudos:
    3,320
    Bookmarks:
    756
    Hits:
    31,742

    12 Apr 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya hadn’t known the video existed. If he had known, he would have paid someone to have it destroyed. Would have paid someone to murder Kuznetsov, maybe, just for redundancy's sake. But it was peak stupidity, to keep evidence of your homosexual perversion around in a country where that crime could get you sent to jail for several decades, and Ilya hadn’t thought that Kuznetsov would be that dumb.

    Now here Ilya was, watching a video of his fourteen-year-old self on Twitter getting fucked by his former hockey coach.

    So. There go the plans for the rest of his life.

    -

    Or: in 2018, during Ilya's last year with the Raiders, an old video is leaked on Twitter. Ilya reacts, or overreacts. Shane does, too.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,773
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    715
    Kudos:
    8,607
    Bookmarks:
    1,893
    Hits:
    81,008

    04 Apr 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya knows what he is. He has always known what he is. The word for it in Russian tastes like something you'd scrape off a boot.

    The word in English is bisexual, which is a nicer word, which he has heard, which he does not use. He uses other words. He uses the word his brother taught him. He uses it on himself before anyone else can.

    He grows up. He gets good at hockey. He moves to America. He... falls in love.

    (Or, five times people fail to notice Ilya being queer, and one time they have no choice.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,459
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    150
    Kudos:
    2,090
    Bookmarks:
    500
    Hits:
    19,179

    20 Mar 2026

  20. Public Bookmark 14

    Tags
    Summary

    What if: Episode 4, but instead of "All the Things She Said," we did "Fuck the Pain Away"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    100
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1,831

    18 Mar 2026

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