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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “Is just the new routine, okay?” Ilya pleaded, his voice breaking. “The pills were working and now there is more stress so I just need to get used to it and will be fixed, okay?”

    “How bad is it?”

    “Shane, please.”

    “Ilya, you promised no more secrets, no more hiding. How bad?”

    He covered his face in his palms, his elbows resting on his knees, and took in a shuddered breath. “...bad.”

     

    OR

     

    After Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander get married, Ilya discovers that his depression won't magically disappear just because he finally has love and a real family. He gets to live and work with Shane full time now that they are on the Centaurs, but it's becomingly increasingly difficult to hide his deteriorating mental health from his husband. He's haunted by dreams of his mother and the fear that his depression and the hockey world's eruption about their relationship is ruining Shane's life. He has to swallow his pride and begin taking SSRIs, navigate the side effects of medicating his depression, and learn to accept love and support from those he loves most. Will the shame eat him alive or can he finally learn that he's worthy of love even at his lowest?

     

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    166,201
    Chapters:
    29/29
    Comments:
    1,227
    Kudos:
    2,623
    Bookmarks:
    1,141
    Hits:
    137,346

    06 Aug 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    With the Montreal Metros suddenly in need of a new head coach, General Manager Shane Hollander turns to the one person who might know as much about winning as he does: his fellow Hall of Famer and ex decade-long situationship, Ilya Rozanov.

    But what starts as a simple job offer soon becomes a life-altering sea change neither could have ever imagined.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,300
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    2,190
    Kudos:
    7,144
    Bookmarks:
    2,807
    Hits:
    161,033

    26 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane wasn’t his boyfriend. But for a while it had felt like it. They’d been alone in his house. He’d made them tuna melts and watched TV. They’d cuddled like a real couple. And then he had to go and ruin it. Like he ruins everything. The press won't stop talking about Shane and Rose. He's turning into his mother and for some reason, Scott Hunter is the only one who sees him. And it scares him.

    OR

    Ilya spirals after the tuna melt scene and engages in self-destructive behaviors. Scott Hunter notices and refuses to go away.

     

    *This is a stand alone fic and is not related to the others in the series.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,566
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    483
    Kudos:
    4,195
    Bookmarks:
    614
    Hits:
    49,063

    16 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “Maybe you don't have to-”

    “Uh-uh. No backtracking now.” Hayden pointed a finger at him. “If you tell Shane, fantastic. Would love that, quite frankly, but until you do, I want those goddamn pictures, Rozanov. Am I clear?” Ilya wanted to make some quip about Pike trying to get a different kind of picture out of him, but given the circumstances... He just nodded. “Good. My kids tragically love the fuck out of you, so figure this out.” Ilya nodded again. “Alright then.”

    Silence followed. Ilya eventually got up, and Hayden awkwardly walked him to the door.

    “Ilya,” he said, surprising him with the first name. “I know what I say doesn’t particularly matter, and I am mainly just a fail-safe for this situation, but…” He opened the front door and clicked his tongue. “For what it’s worth, you’re a good guy and don’t deserve the shit your brain apparently puts you through.”

    "I'm a married man, Pike."

    Or

    Ilya’s depression shifts into some self-harming tendencies, despite how well he can justify most of it. An unexpected cavalry comes together.

    (AKA I found a story filled with sex and decided to hone in on my other favorite things: mental health and complex family dynamics)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,240
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    426
    Kudos:
    3,738
    Bookmarks:
    1,154
    Hits:
    53,483

    16 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    In room 1410, Ilya Rozanov is ready to walk out the door after successfully getting his 19 year old hockey rival into bed. He knew how to make this moment happen and he knows what they have to be to each other now that it's over. But as he turns the doorknob to leave, he's stopped with questions he never expected. And giving Shane Hollander what he needs in that moment will change everything.

    I note which chapters are SFW vs NFSW, because many of you said knowing meant the difference between reading this on your lunch break or having to wait. (Thank you for wanting to read my work that much.)

    Covers the first two years of their rookie seasons (which is mostly skipped over in the show/books). Canon divergent from the first hookup seen in HR s01ep01. Most things are from the show but the timeline is a mix of both; Hunter and Marleau are aged up per the show instead of as young as they are in the books. (Also, Shane and Ilya don't wait *two years*, they stick to the book timeline. IYKYK.)

    Please note this will the first in a series; you can subscribe to the whole series as well so you don't miss anything :)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    166,873
    Chapters:
    34/34
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    10,831
    Kudos:
    15,894
    Bookmarks:
    5,167
    Hits:
    578,987

    29 Jun 2026